Patient X
by blowersgate
Summary: That's why people say love kills." Dark subjects, language, sexual situations. Humour, a little bit of every genre actually, even a parody if you think House turning into some sort of Terminator isn't realistic enough, LOL. House/Cuddy fic.
1. Activation

Author's Note: Yep, I don't know how or why but I started writing this. I don't think it's going to be a long fic like the last one but since I still have some time on my hands, I'm going to try to end it.

This is going to be quite a dark but hopefully, filled with fun, love and good stuff fiction. This is very different from the things I've previously written, maybe I shouldn't have watched 80s movies like Terminator or Blade Runner last week (for the hundredth time again), lol, but I couldn't help but try something. And since I've had a lot of people asking me for a fic, I thought I'd try something that is different while we wait for the end of the season! (and SUMMER, lol)

**So, if you like it (or even love it), I'll try to update fast and hopefully give you some good entertainment. :) If you hate it, please tell me so I can erase that fic from 's database, lol. **

**Rated M**: for dark subjects, language and sexual situations. (just like a good ol' 80s movie!) ;)

* * *

Patient X

Record 1, March 20th,

_What is your name?_

Who cares?

_Do you know your name?_

Smoking can give you cancer, you know?

_I assume you don't. Do you know how old you are?_

Can I get you anything? Coffee… some cake?

_We'll get you whatever you want as soon as we're done here. _

I never said I wanted something.

_You're not being very cooperative. You're not ready. We'll try this again tomorrow._

I've got all the time in the world.

End of Record.

* * *

Patient X

Record 2, March 21rst,

_Good morning, what is your name?_

What's your name?

_You can call me Dave as long as you're ready to cooperate._

Well Dave, can I have a cigarette?

_Sure…Here, help yourself._

I don't have a lighter.

_You haven't asked for one._

Aren't you the smart one!

_What makes you say that?_

You know I can get any information about you by just looking at you. You know that I won't answer your questions because I don't remember. Still, you're trying to figure me out somehow. You're the patient kind which is why your bosses have asked you to study me. You keep on asking me questions hoping you'll get to make some progress with me –maybe with yourself, and for your own benefice, show this beautiful video to your bosses. I don't think you're looking for a raise though. I think you just want to know and you're ready to play with my nerves.

_Would you advise me not to?_

I'm not in control here, so why should I?

_This is where you're wrong. You're in control of what comes in and out of your mouth._

From your eyes I can tell you want to use words such as 'fuck', 'stupid', 'idiot' and even more so, you want to call me by my name. This means you know who I am.

_I do, I just want you to remember it._

Well at least from the looks of my skin, the slow movement of my limbs, I can tell I'm old. Are you happy? You are younger than I am!

_I am young, I am my own boss and I can be anything you want me to be._

Is this heaven or hell?

_You're on earth, it doesn't count._

With a twisted and perverse mind like yours it has to!

_We'll continue this again tomorrow. It was nice talking with you._

Fuck you.

End of Record.

* * *

Patient X

Record 3, March 22th,

_Good evening, I'm sorry for being late. I was busy having a life._

Screwing the mistress maybe?

_Actually… the girlfriend for once. Do you want to see a picture of her?_

Would I happen to know her?

_Yes you do. Here…_

She's pretty but I don't have a clue about who that is.

_That's too bad…_

Why, you want me to sleep with her while you're at your mistress's place?

_No, I want you to kill her._

Oh I see, I'm supposed to be a killer! Wow, the thought had never crossed my mind because-, that's right, I don't remember who the hell I am!

_Quiet down! See that picture on the wall?_

I see a typical American family portrait.

_You've killed all those people. It shouldn't be too hard for you to kill my girlfriend._

Right…is this the twilight zone?

_No._

Why do you want me to kill your girlfriend? Isn't she perfect? The love of your life?

_She is perfect. I'm just not the love of her life._

And that's why your twisted mind is asking me to kill her? Because she's in love with someone else? I can't say I blame her since you're cheating on her and all.

_This is a test. We want to see if you have it in you to kill the love of your life._

This is insane! I don't even know that woman! And I thought you were the boss of you-

_Her name is Lisa Cuddy; she's the dean of medicine of a hospital in Princeton._

This definitely triggers something…not!

_Are you angry?_

No, I can see the birds flying in the sky from here; of course I'm filled with rage.

_Why rage?_

I'm stuck in an interrogatory room Basic Instinct style, except I'm not smoking because you won't give me a damn lighter and as far as I know I'm neither a woman, nor am I wearing nothing under… here. And of course, you're asking me to fucking kill someone!

_We're not the Police._

Who the hell are you then? FBI? NSA? The Mafia? Shrinks? Has Dr. Cuddy asked you to kidnap me and take me to…

_Yes?_

To-

_Who are you?_

I'm…

_Who are you?_

I'm Gregory… House, a board certified diagnostician.

_Good, now do you know what you have to do?_

Primary target: Lisa Cuddy. I have to kill Dr. Lisa Cuddy.

* * *

Darkness.

Images Processing activated on Patient X. Stats normal.

_Pain- Vicodin- Patients- Disease- Bourbon- A man- Doctors- Diagnosis- A woman- Pain- Vicodin- Sex- Affection- Need- Anger- Resolution- A solution- Death- Pain_

Calculation complete. Imaging Process triggered.

_He'll be activated once the thought process is conclusive and matches with the images,_ a man said.

_So, he's ready?_ The man known as Dave asked.

_Yes,_ The other man nodded.

_He's going to do it, _Dave simply said.

_It's scientifically impossible for him to fail. _

_I've always told you he was a monster inside._

* * *

Darkness turned into light. A light from the window came in contact with the man sleeping on a bed. Taking in his surroundings, he recognized his apartment. He checked his alarm; it said 2:00 PM.

"Shit", he said, getting up. As he did so, his head started pounding. He put his hand to it and tried to apply pressure on it –even though it wouldn't do anything.

He went to take a shower that lasted a little longer than he had wanted to, the headache he was experiencing rendering him weak. Once he was done showering, he went to put on some clothes and took two Vicodin. He got out of his apartment and rushed to his motorcycle.

House arrived at the hospital around 3:00PM and went straight to his office. He sat down on the chair behind his desk and tried to relax, definitely aware that he would be dead within the next two minutes.

"Where the hell have you been?" The gorgeous Dean asked, barging in his office.

Actually, it was within the next five seconds.

"Would you believe it if I told you I don't know." He said, scratching his head.

"You've been MIA for three days; I think I deserve some explanation." She yelled slightly, putting her hands on her hips.

"Okay, I must have gotten drunk and I probably took some LSD and fucked a bunch of hookers." He said, adamant, "Is this what you want to hear?"

She shook her head and sighed, "You know, people move forward. People change, they build something. I've changed, I'm building something. You should be doing the same."

"My life's perfectly fine the way it is. Thank you." He said, rising from his chair. He was getting his headache back.

"You should go talk to Peter." She said, folding her arms, stopping him from getting out of the office.

"Mind if I just walk out on you, instead?" He said, raising an eyebrow.

"He could help you." She added, uncertainty filling her eyes.

"And you could also wish upon a star that your boyfriend is gay, but I'm not going to tell you what you want to turn out true." He retorted, his gaze on her fiercely intense.

"You've said you were fine with him." She paused, "And let me remind you that you were the one who never wanted to have a relationship with me in the first place."

"Listen, I have this huge pounding headache that just won't go so I really don't want you feeling sorry for yourself right now." He explained, trying to leave again.

She put herself in front of him, once more, her body coming into contact with his.

"The way your body is touching mine could be considered as sexual harassment, you know?" He indulged her.

"He's a psychiatrist, he could help you." She said, "I know you've considered going to see one." The tenderness in her eyes almost getting to him.

"Even if I did want to go see a shrink, your boyfriend would be the last person I'd go to." He said, the look in his eyes telling her it wouldn't make her life easier.

She sighed and stated, "You have three days of Clinic duty to make up for."

"No, I have some hooker duty to attend to. That's way more exciting." He said, waggling his eyebrows at her.

"You know what's even sicker than you bringing hookers home?"She inquired as he was heading out. He stopped on his tracks, "It's that you ask them to dress like me."

"And who told you that?" He asked, turning around.

"Wilson told Peter before he and I even started dating." She said, not as much at ease with this as she thought she would be.

"And why does it bother you?" He asked her.

"I..." She tried, not sure what to answer to that.

"That's what I thought." He said before turning around again, "You take pride in that fact. That definitely makes you sicker than me." He paused, heading out, "You should ask your boyfriend for a consult."

* * *

After five hours of Clinic that he had managed to pretend doing, House went back to his place. The need for another shower had been calling him for more than an hour. Not knowing where he had been for the past three days was making him uncomfortable. He had a feeling washing away all the things his body might have been in contact with would clear his mind, enough to make him remember something. Anything that would explain the change he was feeling inside him.

House took off his clothes in haste and entered his bathroom. He started the shower and got on his bathtub. Images started to run inside his mind as the hot water hit his cold skin, helping ease the throbbing pain in his leg and head. Isn't the leg enough that he has to see all the things he didn't necessarily want to think of ruin his shower time? He regretted the way he had talked to Cuddy. He was sick. He was aggravated in the fact that he had hated the guy's guts the moment he had laid eyes on Cuddy. Indeed, House would fantasize about Cuddy all the time, even picking hookers with attire that reminded him of Cuddy. However, he had never asked them to wear such clothes, he just wasn't that sick. Sick for her? Probably.

House realized that his hands that had been roaming around his body had landed on his cock. His circle of thoughts froze on Cuddy. His constant desire for her, his need getting the upper hand allowed him to transfer his pain and rage into something more productive for him. As his mind would undress her, the remains of his Jack Daniels drink in his mouth invading hers; he would move his hand up and down his length. His muscled lines increasing with the effort as the rhythm got frantic. He thought of her entire body, from her face, to her breasts to her groin as if he could almost touch it and smell her perfume. His panting got above the sound of the running water, the headache was easing itself. As he imagined her moan his name or words that only such an intimate moment could bring, greater waves of pleasure built up. He jerked off the moment his mind was starting to penetrate her with a strength he hoped he had in him. House backed himself up against the wall of the shower and tried to clear his head. He was insane for jerking off to the woman he couldn't have. Raged filled his eyes as he started to think of Peter doing all the things he had to be the one doing to her. Except he couldn't have her and that made him want to kill her. House opened his eyes wide as that thought crossed his mind, thinking about killing the one person he needed in his life made him sick to his stomach.

_What the hell is wrong with me?_

And he puked all the vicodin he had as well as his lunch in the bathtub.

"Shit." He said, trying to catch his breath.

* * *

"Where were you?" Cuddy asked Peter as he came inside her house.

"A patient, one very sick guy if you ask me." He said, taking off his coat.

"Well, I'm sure you're doing everything in your power to help him." She said, giving him a quick kiss on the lips.

"I am." He said, grinning slightly as he took her in her arms.

"You know, we've been dating for six months and you've never taken me to your office." She said, pouting.

"I don't want you to see all the crazy people running around." He said, "Trust me; you'd probably dump me if you saw the place."

"I run a hospital, remember?" She paused, raising an eyebrow, "And I have the craziest doctor of all at my service." She chuckled.

"Yeah, I still wonder why you haven't fired him yet." He eyed her, "Are you in love with him or something?"

"I'm not in love with House." She smiled at him, "You're the one who matters to me."

He nodded his head slightly, "Excuse me." He said, picking up his ringing mobile. As he saw who it was, he said, "I have to take this."

"Okay." Cuddy said, moving to the living room.

"Yes, Josh." He said.

"There's been an increase in his brain activity about ten minutes ago." Josh paused, "It's working."

"Great." Peter replied, "Do you know what triggered it?"

"The fact that he's reacting quite rapidly to the chip planted in the back of his neck, I think he must have been thinking about her." Josh admitted.

"I should call him and remind him who's doing who tonight." Peter added, a large smug on his face.

"Yeah, you shouldn't do that." Josh explained.

"Of course I'm not going to roam it in his face." Peter paused, "I'm not that much of an idiot, I know how this works."

"But you'd love to do that, don't you?" Josh asked, feeling for his friend's aggravation.

"That's why people say love kills." Peter said, hanging up.

* * *


	2. Addiction

Reviews/critics are extremely welcome. :)

* * *

**Chapter 2: Addiction.**

House got up the next morning feeling literally like crap. He had been sweating most part of the night, only going to sleep about three hours after getting into bed. His head was still filled with images but none of them could be connected to what he had been doing those three days he had no memory of. He wanted to know, he's House. Usually he'd want to try some insane procedures to try and recover his memory but he couldn't make up his mind about it. So instead of trying to diagnose himself, he would go what he's forced to do against a paycheck: his job. As if out of control of his own mind and principles, House got up, took a quick shower and got dressed. He didn't realize as he left that he had taken a bottle of Jack Daniels in his backpack.

After he arrived at the hospital, House went to the fourth floor and dropped his things off. He saw his team was there –actually, his new and old team. Opening the door to the other room, he said, "Do we have a case?"

"Nope." Chase said, "We just wanted to see you."

"Ask you where you've been for the past three days." Cameron said.

"And you still think he's going to answer you?" Foreman let out, rolling his eyes.

"Did you get high?" Thirteen asked out of nowhere.

"DO YOU MIND IF I SPEAK?" House said loud enough for them to shut up.

Kutner and Taub simply nodded, very frightened by his tone.

"I have no memory of where I was and what I was doing, so yeah I think it might be drugs related but let me reassure you, I'm not doing drugs."

"It doesn't really make any sense." Chase cut in.

"I don't think I've ever wanted to make sense out of things I don't want to talk about." House assured him. "Anyway, once I'm done with the Clinic, I'll go to the ER and try to get us a patient . You know, keeping busy instead of doing absolutely nothing like you guys." He added, leaving the room.

"Since when are we the ones doing absolutely nothing?" Thirteen expressed.

"Did he just say he was going to the Clinic?" Foreman cut in.

"House doing Clinic duty?" Cameron paused, "Something's got to be wrong."

* * *

"Hello, I'm doctor House." House said coming in Exam Room 1, "So what seems to be the problem."

* * *

Cuddy came out of her office, ready to do her daily two hours of clinic. Arriving at the Nurse's Station, she asked one of the nurses, "How many patients today?"

"We've had quite a bunch actually." The nurse said, "But every single one of them is being taken care of."

"What do you mean? Is Carson in an extremely good mood today to be taking on so many patients?" Cuddy asked.

"No, it's Dr. House." The nurse shrugged, "He said he wanted to take care of as many patients as he could." She paused, "And he's doing it quite fast."

"No kidding." Cuddy shook her head.

"Don't get me wrong Dr. Cuddy. I was quite surprised as well and so I checked on the patients after they had their consults with him and to my improbable surprise, they were very thankful that Dr. House had diagnosed them so easily and nicely."

"House doesn't do nice." Cuddy frowned.

"Well then he must be rational, apparently, he hasn't been a jerk to them." The nurse said, "So no, I have no patients for you yet."

Suddenly, the door to Exam Room 1 opened and what she saw and heard terrorized her to say the least. A young teenager came out of the room with a smile on his face and she heard House utter, "Next."

She rushed to Exam Room 1, pulling House back inside the room and closed it behind them.

"Cuddy dearest, are you sick too?" He asked, quite stunned in fact.

"What the hell is going on?" She asked him.

"What do you mean?" He asked back.

"You HATE Clinic duty and you don't act nice around patients. So what the hell is going on?" She said.

"First of all, I'm not being nice to them. I'm just not being a jerk. Second of all, I'm supposed to work, aren't I?"

"No! You don't do that!" She expressed, completely out of touch.

"Why can't you just enjoy it and why not thrive on it while it lasts?" He asked her, definitely unable to answer her properly.

"Either something is very wrong with you or you're trying to seduce me by doing the things I've wanted you to do for years." She said, pointing a finger against his chest.

"I don't need to do my job to seduce you Cuddy." He assured her, "I just have to back you up against that wall and you're mine." He claimed.

"Right…" She said, "Whatever is going on, I mean, if it's one of your stupid games again, you better stop it right now because I'm not going to fall for it."

"Maybe something is wrong with me." He said, "But do you honestly believe it's a bad thing that I'm working properly for once in my life?"

"No, it's just-"She paused, concerned, "It's not you."

"Was that a declaration of your unconditional love for me?" He asked, smirking slightly.

"See, I knew this was a trick." She said, "I am not going to fall for this."

"Why would you fall anyway?" He asked, "Don't you have an amazing boyfriend to go back home to?"

"Why are you pushing it?" She asked him, getting slightly angry.

"I'm not. I'm just considering facts." He shrugged.

"No, you're trying to figure out someone other than you because I'm sure you know there's something wrong with you." She claimed.

"You're in denial, which means you know there's something wrong with your relationship with your boyfriend." He said, eyeing her carefully.

"Why are you acting like that?" She asked his analysis of her troubling her and scaring her more than usual. "Something is off!"

"Or maybe something is on and you think you will fall again." He pushed, never feeling this less in control of what was coming out of his mouth.

"I'm done with this." She said, about to leave but before she could take a hold of the doorknob he grabbed her arm fiercely, trying to prevent her from going anywhere. Instantly words echoed in his mind:

_This is where you're wrong. You're in control of what comes in and out of your mouth._

"House, let go of my arm." She said, calmly but he was just not paying attention to her anymore.

"House, let go!" She said louder this time, he was still and completely out of his mind, as if in a trance.

_A man- Doctors- Diagnosis- A woman- Pain- Vicodin- Sex- Affection- Need- Anger- Resolution- A solution- Death- _

She noticed he was starting to sweat, "House." She yelled and he suddenly let go of her arm and said, "Get out Cuddy."

_Pain- Vicodin- Patients- Disease- Bourbon-_

"What the hell is wrong, House!" She exclaimed, "Talk to me, damnit."

"Nothing, I'm just tired." He paused, trying to not make sense of what had just happened. In less than ten seconds, he had images of himself, his addiction, his pain, her squirming naked on top of him and then the same vision he had the previous night. Those flashes had then settled on a bottle of alcohol he was addicted to, which means those images were his, he just couldn't figure anything out.

Cuddy watched him attentively and seeing him process things like that really scared her, "You should go home, House. I'm giving you some time off. Take it." She said, leaving him once and for all as she feared she could put her mind to a stupid state. She couldn't reveal herself to him, not ever, not again.

Was he becoming schizophrenic? House didn't think so as the symptoms just didn't fit. If he hadn't been this good, he would have thought he was schizophrenic –which scared him because he knew that as much as he was a genius he also happened to be a champion when it came to being in denial.

* * *

"Something is wrong with House." Cuddy said, barging in Wilson's office.

"Everything's always wrong with him everyday of the week. It's been like that ever since we've known him, remember?" Wilson shrugged off.

"This time, I'm serious. It's not like he's on a Vicodin roll or like he's switching drugs or just going through depression, he… grabbed my arm quite violently." She paused, "It's just not-"

"House wouldn't even hurt a bee and I'm pretty sure you're the last person on this planet that he wants to hurt."Wilson explained, "

"He's a human being, even I have slapped girlfriends of mine in the past, I mean he could become violent." Cuddy explained, "You never know."

"No, I know for sure he would never hurt you, me maybe because he knows I can take it and truthfully sometimes deserve a few punches just like he does." He paused, "But you? He couldn't. Your boyfriend? Probably though."

"He's been quite okay with this, I think." She folded her arms.

"He has never been." Wilson acknowledged her, "And he'll probably never be."

"It doesn't explain why he would go all strong on me while I'm supposedly the object of his affection." Cuddy added.

"I'll go check on him tonight, okay?" Wilson said, "But I'm sure it's nothing."

"Thanks." She simply said, leaving the oncologist's office.

* * *

House came down to the ER and saw Cameron, "Got any unknown disease for me today?" he asked her, with a smile.

"Did you sleep with Cuddy?" She asked him.

"Not yet!" He stopped smiling.

"Well don't smile like that then because it's weird." She explained.

"Can I has a patient, puhlease?" He asked again.

"I don't have anyone here that could be of any interest to you." She said, going back to her files.

He suddenly grabbed her chart and said, quite angrily, "Well you better give me one fast because I hate not being active."

"House, calm down!" She tried, slightly frightened by his tone and attitude.

"What's wrong?" Suddenly came Chase's voice.

"Nothing." House said, leaving the ER prematurely.

"Are you alright? Did he hurt you?" He asked Cameron, putting an arm on her shoulder.

"I'm… fine but" She paused, "I don't think he is."

"We should tell Cuddy." Chase said, leading her out of the ER.

* * *

House decided to go clear his head and left the hospital. He rode his bike as fast as he could. For those about to Rock by ACDC playing extremely loud in his helmet headphone, he could finally feel in control of something. House felt as if he couldn't control his brain, hence no control over his body and actions, and he had no desire to see anyone anymore. The only thing he could think of at during this controllable ride, was to go home and drink all the bourbon he could just to shut his brain off.

* * *

Cuddy heard a knock on her door and invited the person in. Two friendly faces came inside and both said at the same time, "It's about House."

"What has he done again?" Cuddy asked. The usual.

"Something is very wrong with his attitude and you know how we know ways to deal with him." Cameron paused, "but this time, he just… doesn't respond the way he would usually respond."

"Has he been slightly violent?" Cuddy asked.

Cameron nodded and Chase said, "But she's fine. He just wanted a patient badly, apparently."

"Wilson's going to see him tonight."

"Tell him to wear a shield." Chase tried to joke.

"And if it doesn't work, I guess I'll have to admit him." Cuddy said, looking away.

"Do you think it has anything to do with-"Cameron tried to ask.

"He hasn't brought it up in almost a year and he said he was fine with him." Cuddy stopped her right there.

"And you believe him?" Cameron asked.

"Of course she doesn't!" Chase cut in.

Cuddy took in a breath and said, "I don't know if I can even believe myself."

"'About time!" Chase cut in again and this time, Cameron hit his chest with her elbow.

"Shut up." She murmured.

"You guys should go back to work, if there's anything new, I'll let you know." Cuddy sighed.

They both nodded and headed outside the Dean's office.

* * *

Around 7:00PM, House was already down to his fifth glass of Jack Daniels when he heard a knock on the door.

House groaned and went for the door and opened it.

"Oh My God! Isn't it my best friend?" House expressed, "Well it was nice seeing you, buh-bye." He tried to close the door on Wilson, who inevitably stopped him.

"You're drunk." Wilson said, making his way in.

"Noooooo!" House claimed.

"Can I have one?" Wilson asked, figuring it would be easier to have a conversation with his friend if he were to make the situation more enjoyable with alcohol.

"That's my man!" House said, getting on his couch and pouring his friend a drink.

Wilson eyed him carefully before he sat down next to his friend. Something struck him. An ashtray was on the table, "I didn't know you enjoyed cigars outside fundraisers and pranks.", Wilson raised an eyebrow.

House picked something situated behind him on the couch, "A pack of cigarettes?" Wilson exclaimed seeing the item in House's hand.

"I have no idea why but I've suddenly developed an addiction."

"It's not even open yet." Wilson frowned, ready to stop his friend from opening it, any second now.

House shook his head no as he started to open it, "You either let me or I throw you out of my apartment."

Wilson gave up and took a sip of his own bourbon.

"I know you're trying not to ask me so I'm going to talk about it freely, from my own perspective which will allow you to bring your conclusions to Cuddy." House paused, putting the cigarette in his mouth and lighting it, exhaling the smoke he said, "Trying to pretend you're not diagnosing the diagnostician is not something you're very good at."

"Okay, I fold." Wilson said, "What happened between you and Cuddy today?"

He took another puff and said, "I was thinking about something and didn't realize I was applying too much pressure on her arm. I wasn't thinking, neither about stopping her or anything else. It happens you know, just like my epiphanies."

"Except it wasn't an epiphany House!" Wilson got a little annoyed.

"It doesn't matter." House said gulping his sixth glass of bourbon and said, "It won't happen again."

"Tomorrow, I'm asking Cuddy to admit you for some tests." Wilson said, getting up.

"What?" House chuckled, "Come on, I didn't go to the fucking hospital for three days and now suddenly I'm this guy that seems different?" He paused, "What do you think happened in those three days?"

"I don't know and you don't seem to be remembering anything." Wilson argued.

"And you think that maybe something happened to me?" House expressed.

"Well you're the diagnostician. Shouldn't you have figured this out already?" Wilson kept going, "If you can't remember even the slightest thing, I mean, come on! It is so obvious something has happened to you."

"Or maybe I just don't want to tell you guys what happened." House shrugged.

"No you wouldn't and the fact that you just got extensively wasted proves it." Wilson expressed, walking to the front door.

"Come on, I handle my booze quite correctly and you know it!" House said, "By the way, are you going to finish that?" House asked Wilson, pointing at the practically full glass of bourbon his friend hadn't drunk.

Wilson shook his head and opened the door, his friend's denial taking its toll on the nice oncologist he was.

"I'm going to finish it then." House said taking the drink in his hand.

"Sure…help yourself." He yelled before slamming the door shut behind him.

_Well Dave, can I have a cigarette?_

_Sure…Here, help yourself._

_I don't have a lighter._

_You haven't asked for one._

A sudden image hit him, one that had nothing with the ones he had been seeing for the past two days. A room filled with blinds, a man and a conversation he didn't recall. However this image that had filled his brain brought him no aching in his head. House frowned and moved his weak and wasted self to the nearby laptop. He opened his web browser and started to look for something that wasn't medically approved of or even, scientifically proven: Hypnosis on memory loss and as a means to manipulate the central nervous system.

* * *


	3. Evaluation

Reviews are forever extremely welcome.

* * *

**Chapter 3: Evaluation.**

Cuddy had been waiting for Peter on her couch for the past three hours. Legs crossed and a frown never leaving her face, wonder was set in between a wish and anger. She didn't like him being this late because if there was one thing about her great psychiatrist of a lover was that she didn't trust him. She had reasons to as he had been honest enough to tell her he had cheated on his girlfriends and even his wife in the past. No, she didn't like that at all even though her answer to him had seemed to come out easily when they started dating. She had accepted his flaws at one condition though, that he would tell her if his urge had to come out again so she would put a stop to it. However, she wasn't fooling herself. Sure, she gave him a chance but that doesn't mean she has to put this much trust in him. If he has something to tell her, she wants him to say it. Isn't he the good kind of guy after all? The one who brings her flowers, make sweet passionate sex to her. One who doesn't forget about an anniversary and who also happens to take you to dinner at least once a week. Obviously, he's flawed but nobody's perfect. 'He's the good kind of guy', she would repeat to herself everyday. Unlike House who happens to be the bad kind of guy as he can't put up with false pretenses when it comes to relationships. If only he wasn't such a good kind of mess to her. If only she didn't trust him with her life. In her miserable life made of wrong choices, she would happen to stay sometimes, wondering on her couch for hours until her current life would take the better of her once more.

"Hey, hon." She head him open the door, calling after her, "Where are you?"

"Living room." She said simply without bothering to meet him halfway.

"What's going on?" He asked, trying to catch up his breath.

"You're late again." She said, finally getting up, "I'm going to bed, there's some left over for you in the kitchen."

She walked to the bedroom and closed the door behind her. Peter sighed and picked up his phone and dialed the last number on his calls list, "Anything?"

"No." Josh said, "Brain activity is elevated but not as much as the images he's had again during the day." He added, concerned.

"Which means he hasn't had anymore flashes…" Peter's voice trailed off slightly.

"Well, you know how this works, right? The chip set on his medulla oblongata triggers itself, thanks to the sensors attached to it and connected to his peripheral nervous system-"Josh tried.

"And the PNS is connected to the Central nervous system, which controls the subject's behavior. Blahblahblah. "Peter cut Josh off, "Thanks for the never ending lesson Mr. I have a PHD from MIT. We know that."

"Every time something in his environment triggers his CNS and subsequently the calculations of his chemical synapses, are transferred into the image processing software integrated in the chip." He paused, "That I've created with the most amazing computers on the planet-"

"The Calculated Brain Reconstructive Imaging that you've created thanks to my dollars, you mean." Peter added, "Seriously, can you just go straight to the point!"

"Why you've got your girl to bone?"Josh, "I understand her… who would want to have sex with you, really…,"

"She's pissed…"

"Well, he's probably the reason why and you are going to have to listen to me if you don't want this to end up really bad." Josh warned him.

Peter sighed and Josh kept going, "He gets those images as something close to three emotions: first a revelation, then a need and finally a behavior he can control. It'll always go in that order and when the first two emotions will be at their peeks, the third one will be inevitable and he won't be able to control himself. This is something you have to remember. He will be unstoppable."

"I know…" Peter sighed, "So what makes you doubt yourself now?"

"How do you know I-"Josh tried, bewildered.

"The tone in your voice when you first told me about the elevated brain activity."

"God, why do you have to keep on reminding me that you're the brain behind this?" Josh didn't really ask.

"House is easier to decipher than you, Josh." Peter admitted.

"Well, anyway, you've figured him out right because his brain has been on overload and I think you can confirm mostly everything with your girlfriend tonight." He paused, "But yes, I have some concerns, his focus might have gone onto something else since he hasn't had anymore flashes. And what he might be focusing on –with everything you've told me about the man, could be dangerous to us."

"He's never going to figure this one out and an MRI would kill him." Peter paused, "Either way, he'll be out of my sight no matter what."

"But you know a PET scan or a CT won't be a problem. And as soon as it would be disconnected from his-"Josh tried.

"Let's hope his mission will be complete before that happens."

"You shouldn't underestimate him." Josh warned him again.

"I'm not, but he's going to destroy her instead of technology no matter what." He finally added, hanging up.

Peter loosened his tie and took off his jacked. He knocked on the bedroom door before coming in the blackened room; she was under the sheets already. "Hey." He said, "I'm sorry for being late again tonight. I promise you I'll make it up to you."

"You promised that you would tell me if you were…" her voice trailing off, "Are you cheating on me?" She asked, firmly as a means to try and compose herself.

"No." He said, "I'm not him. I don't jump into another woman's bed because I can't handle a relationship with you."

"He never cheated on me because he and I have never been together per se anyway." She affirmed.

"Well I'm in this with you and I've told you this before. With you it's different; I mean, maybe I didn't make myself clear before." He paused, moving to the bed, "I love you."

She said nothing but he kept going, "And so far I've never heard you say it." The tone in his voice extremely believable regarding his attentions toward her, she simply showed him to move even closer. He sat on the bed and bend down slightly to kiss her on the lips.

They kept kissing, she even pulled him closer. A way of not having to say things she had no intention of saying because she couldn't trust herself. She started to work on the hem of his pants as he took off his shirt. He started to hike up her night gown just enough to reveal her to him. He buried his head in the crook of her neck. His kisses on her getting frantic and her mind in between a cry for help and a moan, she stopped by pushing him to the other side of the bed, "I can't, I'm sorry." She caught her breath, "Today was not a good day and I-"

Peter sighed and said, "What did he do again?"

"How would you-"She tried.

"Simple guess." He shrugged, "What… did he hurt you verbally?"

"He… no, he just needs some help, I think, he was acting weird."

"If he does anything to you, you hear me anything!" He started, getting mad.

"He's House, he would never do that." She assured him, putting a hand on his chest, "I just have to take a few more risks into account."

"What risks?"

"The fact that his pain could make him more prone to violence." She expressed her voice low.

"I'm worried there's something you're not telling me." He sighed, "I mean, I could help him, you know?"

"He doesn't want your help, besides I'm his doctor, it's my job to help him." She said.

"You're the chief." He tried to joke. She smiled at that comment, thinking more of a synonym she is more used to rather than the actual comment.

Being an excellent comedian allows one to smirk in the middle of the night. Progress is the way to success.

* * *

House didn't believe in aliens but he did believe in scientists and sick bastards. After all he was sort of one. House ruled out hypnosis to focus on human behaviors. Being a specialist in human behaviors himself, makes him more at ease with the subject –except in this case, without a third person's eye, he can't be objective. Hence the reason why, he still didn't know which way to go with this. House would have usually thought of himself as a time bomb but giving the circumstances he would put 'an emotionally induced' before the 'time bomb' description. He didn't know if the flashes of images he had were connected to his thoughts and behaviors, because as much as he wanted them to, they had no correlation whatsoever with the present. They would come in randomly and afterwards, he couldn't control his actions. He had seen it, his mind shut off somehow but he could see it, as if he was indeed schizophrenic and what not close to a dissociative identity disorder –except in these stretches of time, he shouldn't be able to remember what he did. What mattered was what was happening in the meantime and it was the time he didn't have for himself. An inhibition…without it being even close to an explainable one, and the symptoms didn't even fit with rare diagnosis.

What would have been even more thrilling for him would have been to expect to diagnose a rare disease on himself. Except he couldn't. Nothing would fit.

"I don't know what I have." He murmured to himself.


	4. Determination

Author's note: Just remember before you read this that House will seem OOC, well of course he has to be for this story to work. But he isn't really, it's mostly what is happening to him that makes him shift from one position to another: conversation-wise and also regarding his actions. It's a mind game, (and what I'm about to say is really going to make me laugh but that's really what's happening, lol) emotions vs hardware! It's like trying to beat an AI which is most of the time impossible.

You also have to take into account that (in case you don't remember, it's implied in the story) they have had several one night stands in the past, which can explain Cuddy's actions.

I'm really writing this story without really describing the changes because I want them to come mostly as a surprise. I don't know if I'm doing this right but at least I'm trying something different. Let me tell you, this is pure hardcore, lol. :P

I hope you're going to enjoy this chapter. And if you do, please review, review! Seriously they help me write super fast, besides you really do want to know what's going to happen in the next chapter. ;)

* * *

**Chapter 4: Determination.**

The next morning, Cuddy came in House's office. The sight of her startled him even though he had been expecting her.

"Hey." She said, remaining at the door, "How are you feeling?"

"I'm fine." He said.

"Right." She paused, obviously preoccupied, "I want to run some tests."

"I don't want you to be my doctor this time." He said, looking away, "I've already asked Kutner and Taub to come by later."

She sighed and asked, "Why don't you want my help?" She wasn't giving up on him yet, "I know you want me to help you, somehow I know you trust me with-"

She tried but he cut her off, "The only thing I need from you is to get as far away from me as possible. In the meantime, don't worry; I'm going to have my peeps take great care of me."

"You're shutting me out, House." She folded.

In an instant, his position in the conversation changed, need and affection rushed through him, feelings in the form of flashes from the small times they have had for them in the past. "No, you've been shutting me out, Cuddy." He got up, quite angry and walked to her, trying to set his need for denial back in the conversation, "So you go back to your perfect life, to your perfect boyfriend. Go back to your consults with benefits."

An urge came through her and she slapped him in the face and as if his eyes had become dark with a mix of pride and hatred, she backed away in shock, "I practically live with him, you have no right-"She tried.

"This situation is quite arousing actually." He said, still eyeing her with eyes that expressed nothing but emotions she could figure out.

"What?" She let out, walking backwards until her back hit the glass door.

"He has been cheating on you, hasn't he?" House expressed, smirking slightly.

"Why are you bringing this up again? Why now?" She claimed.

"So you've been thinking about it, haven't you?" He kept pushing, "Do you think he's cheating on you?"

"I don't know." She replied, not sure what to answer to a man closing the space between them with eyes still blue but that didn't seem like his. Something was indeed very wrong. But she couldn't prevent herself from being attracted to them, to this tone, to his form. Simply to the one thing she has been denying herself all those years.

"I've told you before that you couldn't trust a guy like him." He said, "You've always been looking for easy ways out. He isn't good for you, Cuddy." He added, the fury in his eyes making her lose control, what she didn't know was that he had no control over himself either. Even though more forward with his opinions, he was still House.

He moved his face closer to hers and to her surprise, he was enjoying her, her sent and only did it to make her crave for him to just touch her. The unstable rush of emotions led her to speak clearly, "Are you?" she asked, her mouth opened slightly.

"I don't cheat." He claimed, kissing her cheek and he froze as another flash hit him. This time his shirt was covered in blood and he fell to the floor, the body that was only seconds ago pressed against his, was at that moment impaled on a sharpen doorknob, a small cry and fear as well as incomprehension had settled in his eyes. He started to scream 'No' at the intimate void surrounding him.

"House!" He could hear coming from outside the confined space he was trapped in.

"House calm down, it's okay, I'm here." He could hear Cuddy speak.

"Cuddy?" He said, a sob escaping him, his vision getting blurry.

"Pupils are dilated." He heard a male voice.

"He could be doing drugs, which would explain… what just happened." He could hear another voice, "Again, what happened exactly?"

"I don't know, we were talking and he just froze and fell down, he started shaking." He could hear Cuddy's frail voice again, "House, I'm here, it's okay."

He heard the word 'Seizure' being asked and then Cuddy's answer came, which was a poignant 'no'.

He could feel her hands on his face, his vision getting back on tracks; he sensed and heard her hush to his ear. Her face was close and he suddenly realized he had experienced another flash, but a different one.

"I'm fine." He said, meeting her eyes.

"You're not fine, House." She expressed, fear written all over her face.

He tried to get up. Seeing his difficulty she tried to stop him, "Lie down" she ordered, grabbing his arm with her hand, but he just wouldn't hear it and he eventually managed to rose up to his feet, her arms never leaving his.

"Taub, Kutner!" He said to the two other people he had then recognized, his voice low, "I need you to start working on my blood work ASAP."

The both of them nodded and simply headed out, figuring Cuddy would take care of the rest.

"No, you two stay with him." She said, "I'll go take care of the blood work."

"Since when does the Dean do the lab rats' job?" House asked, annoyed by her invasion of –somehow, privacy.

"Because I don't want you to cheat on me." She said, her sentence filled with intentions only he could get. He rolled his eyes and she nodded once before leaving his office.

"Okay, she's not the smartest doctor so I think she is going to need your help." He expressed, "Symptoms?"

"Apparently, you fell to the floor like a iceberg and you've started shaking." Kutner shrugged.

"Dilated pupils." Taub added, "Is there something you're not telling us?"

"She's going to look for drugs but unless I've been drugged about five days ago, then no I'm not doing drugs." House scratched his beard, "There's got to be something else… you go with her, I think I'm going to go home. Schedule a CT for me tomorrow." He ended, grabbing his coat.

"You can't go home!" Kutner tried to stop him, "You're obviously sick. We have to keep you under observation."

"No you don't. I'm feeling perfectly fine and diagnosing myself is something my ego can take. So I'm going to go home while you go check on Cuddy's House and on my blood work… preferably on that order if you're as obsessed with She-Devil as I am." House said, putting his coat on.

"I hope for your sake House that you're right and that it's not worse than we think it is." Taub said, folding his arms.

"What is wrong with you guys?" House spiced up his tone with his regular sarcasm, "You know, I'm always right!" He paused, not sure why he couldn't come up with a better repartee these days, "And as far as I know, going home and rest has never killed anyone!"

And he was gone, "Is it me or does he look like a complete stranger?" Kutner told Taub.

"Let's go check on his favorite ass." Taub expressed, patting his friend on the shoulder.

* * *

"He has gone home!" Cuddy yelled, barging in Wilson's office.

"Hm. Will you excuse me for a minute?" Wilson excused himself to the patient seated in front of him, an apologizing look on his face.

He met Cuddy's eyes with his groaning ones instead of having to break the silence before the cancer patient.

"Stop frowning." She said, as he pushed her outside his office.

"You're worse than him these days, you know?" Wilson scratched his head, "I was telling that woman that she is dying and you just barge in like that, what the hell is wrong with you?"

"He's not fine!" She yelled again.

"Yes, simmer down, will you?" He paused, "And I know that; I was going to go tell you later."

"How was he last night?" She asked, concern written all over her face.

"He was himself and filled with denial."Wilson sighed, "I know there's something wrong but I can't seem to be able to figure it out. I mean his behavior hasn't really changed-" He tried.

But she unconfirmed it in haste, "No, with me he's acting strange. One minute I'm the boss he absolutely hates and the next I'm the object of affection all over again except-"

"Except what?" He asked, frowning.

"Except when we were like this before, when we used to reach this kind of intimacy, he wasn't like that." She paused, looking down, "He acts differently around me these days."

"Maybe it's because he wants you and because you're with someone. The man is an ass but he's not a homewrecker." He reconsidered that one, "Well, save for my ex-wives but he was actually helping at the time-"he tried but she cut him off again.

"It's different, he pushes it to the edge where I might…just give in to him."She said, "He just hits the right spots, something he would have never dared doing in the past. He wants me and he's giving me clues that he means it but there's something that tells me it's not right."

"Well, obviously you don't want to end up cheating on Peter!" Wilson said, using his best duh tone.

She bit her lower lip, "It's not that easy. He's… House I don't trust myself with him but I trust him." She paused, "But for once I don't trust him completely and I'm not about to give in to him because I know that he's acting weird, like I'm this thing he wants but I see him holding himself back. Oh God, even I can't explain this. It's just so strange and the fact that he went out of his mind again."

"What do you mean 'he went out of his mind'?" Wilson asked.

"Taub and Kutner are finishing working on his blood." She let out, "I thought it was drugs, I don't know what he's on or what's happening to him." She paused, "He fell down earlier but in my opinion, it's as if he had thrown himself down on purpose. Like he was in a total different scene or perspective…"

"Woah, indeed you two are getting yourselves in weird situations these days." Wilson acknowledged, raising an eyebrow, "And since it's obviously not drugs, you're thinking?"

"Brain tumor?" She asked back.

"We should schedule an MRI-"Wilson tried.

"Kutner and Taub told me they already scheduled him for a CT scan tomorrow." She explained, "Apparently, he has asked for it."

"Of course, the man has to at least try to diagnose himself." Wilson shook his head, "He needs us."

"Yes." She said, "We'll be there." She smiled one of these small smiles of hers.

Wilson nodded and gave her a hug before walking back to his office.

* * *

Cuddy came home early that evening and went straight to her bathroom and took a shower.

A few minutes later, a sort of disheveled Peter opened the door to her house and headed straight for the bedroom. He went through the drawer she had given him about thee weeks ago. Cuddy came out of the shower, dried herself and put some jeans and a small t-shirt on. She heard some noise coming from the bedroom. She walked to it, a smirk on her face and slammed it open. What she saw broke the smirk off her face, "What happened to your back?" She asked, trying to compose herself.

His hands were still inside the drawer, he was obviously looking for clean clothes, "I can explain." He said, turning back.

"How can you explain scratches on your back?" She retorted and he rose up from where he was, "Don't you dare touch me!" She yelled.

"It's not what you think!" He yelled back, his eyes pleading her not to make something out of what wasn't.

"I want you out of this house now!" She expressed, "You lying to my face is just… you know what? It's not even worse than having to hear the fucking truth because...Oh wait! There isn't one single truth with you. "

"Okay, you've obviously had a bad day, I get it, we all have days like that but I swear to you, I didn't-"He tried to explain, his arms reaching out for her. She made a few steps back and cut him off, "GET OUT!"

"I'm not leaving." He said, "Why would I cheat on you, Lisa?" He licked his lips, "I need you, we help each other, we're in this together, remember? I love you and I wouldn't do anything to hurt you-"He tried as he kept walking in her direction.

"Then, I'm leaving." She said, "Trying to help you? Was the worst idea I've ever had. You can't help a guy that trusts himself with someone else just a little too much." She rushed to the living room, grabbed a pair of shoes and her keys and left.

Peter put his arms on his hips and chuckled. He went for his clothes and picked up his phone from his jacket. He dialed Josh's number.

"This better be important because I'm in the middle of The Silence of the Lambs." Josh, said, munching on his chips.

"I think it's going to happen soon." Peter claimed, through a smirk, "I want you to monitor his brain activity. You haven't moved the truck, right?"

"I've been following the guy for the past two days, of course I'm with-"He tried.

"Good, I'll be there in twenty minutes."

* * *

House was watching some TV when he heard a knock on the door, he got up from the couch reluctantly yelling, "If this is for The Renaissance of Greek Gods, I'm sorry but I have already enough trouble believing in one God-"He stopped as he saw who was at his doorstep.

"Hey." She said, shaking slightly.

"What are you doing here?"He asked, going back to his couch, however leaving the door wide open for her.

"I don't really know, actually." She paused, coming in and closed the door behind her, "I just kept on driving and eventually, I ended up here."

He pretended to ignore her, maybe because he wanted to hear more. At least that's what she thought and so, she kept going, "This way I can check up on you. I know how much you want me on your back" She tried to joke.

House closed an eye in wonder, "I think –and I'm just stating this to keep the sexual innuendo at bay, that you like it better when I'm on your back."

She smiled, pleased with the fair banter that had settled between them. She moved from the door to his couch and said, "Do you mind if I watch some TV with you?"

"What is going on?" He suddenly expressed, her proximity already making him uncomfortable. He already couldn't trust himself and he had figured out that with her, it was even worse. Whatever was happening to him he had to be extremely careful.

"Of course, that's why you've let me come inside. It's because you want to know. You always want to know, sometimes don't you just don't want to?" She raised an eyebrow at him.

He didn't meet her eyes and said, "There's always a solution somehow and I'm determined to discover them."

"You were right." She sighed, "I shouldn't have dated him in the first place. I knew he would hurt me someday."She said, bringing her knees to her chest, just like a little girl would.

"You're not showing any real pain though." He stated matter-of-factly, "You're not even crying."

"You've made me cry and you've put me through quite an amount of pain but, still I couldn't say you've hurt me." She paused, trying to search his eyes, "And it seems I can't stop coming back to you."

"You're not here for me." He stated, meeting her eyes, "You're here because you want to get back at him for cheating on you by cheating on him with me." He paused, "I might be sick but I'm not dumb."

Shock reached her facial expression. She had expected a lot from him but not this and especially not with that tone, "I'm not here for that, House!"

"Then what's with the eyes? You've got that look in your eyes that you know makes me crave for you." He expressed, "You want to use me while the only thing I actually want to do to you is be there for you."

"You… the most obnoxious jackass I've ever came to know, are trying to make me look like the bad guy, here? I'm the one who's always there for you; I've wanted to be with you while you just wouldn't!" She got mad, "You are reflecting your own fucked up self on me!"

"No, I'm just stating the obvious." He said, "Aren't you supposed to just… leave now?" He asked because he wanted her to leave. He had been playing a game he wasn't sure he could win. Also, the both of them being vulnerable wouldn't help him or her for that matter. These probably were the last moments where he could control himself.

"I'm not leaving." She said; her tone firm.

"I want you to leave." He said, trying to get up from the couch. However, she prevented him from doing so by moving onto him and straddling him. She had successfully trapped him and wasn't ready to let go of him until he would stop playing with her, "I want you to stop pretending here." She said her face inches from his.

"Cuddy, get off me." He warned her, knowing that if he stopped playing, that would mean he wouldn't be in control anymore.

She rolled her eyes, "And then you're going to tell me, this wasn't an innuendo."

"I'm not struggling yet." He paused, "And if I do, you might get hurt."

"You won't because you can't hurt me, you want me too much." She murmured against his mouth.

"What I say or want doesn't matter here." He said, getting even more absorbed by the situation, he was going to lose this one, "I need you to leave."

"And I need you." She expressed, "Which is why I'm risking my pride here."

"You've been through quite some stuff today, you're not thinking clear-" He tried to avoid the real issue that had settled itself before and on top of him as a means to escape a truth he didn't know if he could control or not.

"Say it then, say you don't want me." She stated, "I can take it, I'm a big girl."

Before his mind could speak for itself, words came out of him mouth, "No you can't because you're in love with me and you're in no position to be asking for anything."

"Hold on a sec-"She tried, putting a hand to his chest.

"I need to hear it." He said, a dark monotone settling in his voice.

"Is that what you want to hear me say?" She asked, her voice trembling.

As if all of his self had shut itself down, he grabbed the small of her back, bringing her lips next to his, touching slightly, "I have to know." He expressed.

Her mouth still touching his she prayed to her guts that it was the right thing to let him know of and simply said it, "I love you."

He breathed in her mouth as if feeling freed from all the things that had held him back all those years, as he kept on inhaling and exhaling, his chest heavy from the breathing, Cuddy stared at him, slightly panic from his lack of response. His defense mechanism had moved from his highest to his lowest in matter of days and then seconds. He had lost control a lot but now for the first time in days of flashes and nonsense he felt back in the game, in control. A great paradox as his need for her wasn't something he could control perfectly. But the fact that nothing she had said had set him off again made him realize that maybe all the things he had seen where just part of his brain trying to make sense for him, a translation of what things shouldn't be like. He wants her; he can't want to kill her. Her breathing still fixed on him made him quit the thought process her words had engendered and in an instant he took a chance and kissed her lower lip, slightly sucking on it. Her eyes meeting his closed ones, she did the same thing to him, only on his upper lip. He opened them and grabbed her head with his hands and pulled her into a full kiss, his determination getting to her.

House couldn't cheat on the chip inside his head, even though House would never cheat in a moment like this. The time bomb game was on, except he hadn't been playing it. All this time, he was being played by it.

As the dueling of their tongues became frantic, House's head became filled with _sex_, _affection_ and _need_.

* * *


	5. Disorientation

It gets tough, sensible minds... well you shouldn't be reading this story anyway, lol.

Isn't that one fast update?!

Can I has reviews, please? xD

* * *

**Chapter 5: Disorientation.**

Swaying.

She was swaying in his arms, the movement of her body against his lap an unstoppable loss of sense of direction.

The confrontation of need remaining the only barrier between them, they couldn't set any sort of pace in their love making. Their frantic kisses putting them at loss of breath.

Progression would ensue but not at this precise moment where they parted and looked into each other's eyes. A moment of awareness had settle in her blue grey ones, she was in love with that man and he just couldn't tell her how he felt about her. But she knew he would show her. His eyes were filled with emotions she not only couldn't describe but had no intention to question. Instead she put the palm of her hand against his cheek and rested her forehead on his, "I'm not using you."She whispered, "But if you really think I should leave, I will."

He moved his hands up her shoulder, from behind and said, "I don't want to hurt you."

"You can't hurt me." She retorted, inhaling deeply.

"There are things I can't seem to be able to control these days and you're among the first who have noticed it."He explained, never breaking the contact with her.

"I trust you." She said, not giving him anymore chance to back up. She wanted this and there wasn't any reason for her to let go of him. She grabbed her shirt and slowly lifted it up her head and threw it to the ground. House observed her every move; she took his hands and put them back on her shoulder. Her hands were caressing his arms above the fabric of his shirt, asking to roam his hands over her bare chest. House brought his face up to her once more and met her mouth and started kissing it once more, "Have I told you that you smell of cigarette?"She murmured against his mouth before he moved it to her jaw line, "Maybe." He simply answered and then moved to kissing her breasts. She didn't push the questioning any further and started unbuttoning his shirt. House's hand left her upper body to go work on the hem of her jeans, he unbuttoned it and as if the sound of unzipping it had triggered something, a hasty progression ensued. Their rhythm got back to being frantic and she helped him take off his shirt fast.

Her hands tried to touch everything her position on top of him would allow her to, she brought her face to the crook of his neck. Her knees that had been resting on each side of him, which had been supporting all her weight wouldn't prevent her from practically taking her with him in their quivering session. She worked on his jeans and then lowered them to accelerate what was inevitable now. She got off him to take off her jeans properly and went to straddle him back. She started rubbing herself against him and as she involuntarily tilted her head back from sensing what an act such as this one could do to two people, he made his entire upper body reach out to hers and fiercely brought his mouth to her neck, kissing every part of it he came in contact with. The couch would be enough for what they wanted from each other, he would be what she wants him to be and he would tell her how he feels for a moment. The point wasn't to make it last, it was to make it erratic and passionate. It didn't mean she wasn't expecting him to be rough. House wasn't experiencing anything but her and he was thankful for that. He needed to be there, the whole time, with her, making her feel and feeling her. She took the upper hand and guided him inside her and in an instant her mostly dominant position was reduced to a mere impression. He pinned her down completely on top of him, preventing her from doing any work and started thrusting hard. For about a minute he kept making her gasp with each and every movement. Her eyes rolled at the back of head, his attention to her a compromise between affection and basic need. He then started to slide in and out of her faster and faster, her moans becoming obvious to him. She would squirm uncontrollably on top of him; her body couldn't get any closer to his. His, was doing all the work and she would just end up being his.

Whether the act was a mere fantasy from his part or a proof that she was the object of his affection, it couldn't stop her from loving and enjoying it fully. She didn't even bother to wonder how he could pull a stunt like this one, although the probable pain in his leg should have been a triggering factor. That loss of control: making her crave for an accumulation of this non awareness she was giving in to him. Their mutual panting becoming as extreme as the sweat that had form on their bodies, she eventually came, trapped in his arms until he followed after her. He let go of her grip on her, enjoying this insane moment where a pleasuring disorientation can bring two people nowhere but together, the thought of the aftermath still buried in between the contact of skin against skin. She moved her face to the crook of his neck once more and kissed it a few times. House had his eyes closed, completely out of phase by what had just happened. She let go of his neck to study him and put her hand in his hair, caressing his scalp slightly. She thought he was still enjoying his own pleasure, a moment of privacy each of them obviously needed, in peace with the darkness his closed eyes were offering him. She smiled at the idea that House could be so peaceful. She put her mouth back to his ear and said just above a whisper, "I love you so much."

This was as honest as she could get with him and a rush of flashes came back to him, what he thought was gone appeared once more. From behind glassy eyes, his brain was trying to make sense in between what was real and what was just his imagination or the pseudo emotions planted in his head, "Get off me." He suddenly yelled, pushing her away from him. A stunned Cuddy watched him get off the couch and pulling his pants up, "House, are you okay?" She tried to ask.

"Get out!" He yelled once more rushing to his bedroom, coming in without looking back at her; he slammed the door shut at once.

Cuddy put her jeans back on and picked up her shirt from the ground, she walked to his bedroom while covering herself entirely again. "House, what is going on?" She asked from behind the door, hitting it with the palm of her hand a couple of times.

"Just get the fuck out of here!" He screamed as he fell down alongside the door, a headache forming at the back of his head once more.

"Is it because I've said it without you asking me? Is that it?"She asked, anger had risen in her tone. She would cry if there wasn't going to be any resolution to this.

"Leave me the fuck alone, Cuddy!" He screamed some more, sensing his heart rate elevating. His brain activity was making his head want to explode.

"I'm not leaving! I need you to stop shutting me out, House!"She started crying, hitting the wall a couple of more times, "Open the damn door!"

"I need you to fucking leave….NOW!" He screamed again, the pattern setting itself in his brain once more, emotions getting to him in between flashes.

_Pain- Vicodin-_

Why was his head hurting him now?

_Bourbon- A man-_

House hated those visions of himself, desperation and misery suddenly accentuating the fact that he was a piece of shit.

_A woman-_

Her own personal piece of shit; nevertheless, an obsession to him.

_Pain- Vicodin-_

The throbbing pain in his leg getting insanely hard for him not to pass out, he was screaming in agony.

"House!" He kept hearing her scream.

_Sex- Affection- _

It was different, not the way it had happened a couple of minutes before this pathetic breakdown. Tough but passionate love where he was letting her be the one she's always wanted to be.

_Need-_

Thinking he needs her that way.

_Anger- _

And she is no better than any other woman for letting him do as pleased.

"House, please just let me in!" He could hear her beg in between cries again. The loud banging in his head making it impossible for him to know what the hell was happening with him anymore. His thought process reaching the edge: from a true intention to a false explanation.

_Resolution- _

Trying to take away all those images, he put all his energy on his feelings for her. Love, even more as it would fit in the category of adoration and of constant need.

_A solution- Death-_

The annoyance his pain and constant banging as well as begging from her irritating voice got to him, he had to end this revelation that he wasn't self sufficient to himself and also, he wanted to fucking shut her up. "SHUT UP!" He groaned but she kept yelling. He got up as if he had just got a shot of adrenaline. He could tell his heart was pumping extremely fast and he opened the door in once swift move. His body taking control over his brain, he eventually lost it all as if he could see his limbs ready to go into overload at the expectation of going after a prey.

The look in his eyes told her something wrong could happen any minute now; she just didn't know what it could be. Her instinct crushing her trust in him, she made a few steps back, trying that very moment to gauge his entire being.

"I've told you to leave!" He suddenly groaned while rushing to her. He firmly put his hands around her neck and started squeezing the life out of it. Cuddy's eyes went wide from what he was trying to do hit her as well as the incapacity to breath he was causing her. Instinctively she put her hands on his arms, trying to stop him, only she couldn't. "I don't want to kill you, Cuddy." He groaned through gritted teeth even though he was seconds away from killing her by strangulation. Her agony wasn't getting to him. Nothing was, he just couldn't stop himself, "I'm killing you…primary target… Lisa…" He groaned again and in a matter of seconds, someone crack the front door open and moved in the direction of the scene and tasered him fast, the electricity making House squirm in pain. He eventually let go of his hold on her neck and fell to the floor, the shaking of his body making him hurt his head against the nearest table. Cuddy fell to the floor as well and grabbed her neck, trying to catch her breath. Making sense of what had just happened and what was happening this very moment being an impossible thing to do.

Peter checked the unconscious man's pulse and then yelled, "You stay the hell away from her, you monster!" Cuddy heard the individual's voice and recognized it instantly, "Peter?" She said, choking.

"It's alright, I'm here." He said, turning around and rushed by her side, "It's okay." He hushed her, taking her in his arms.

"He…" She tried to say.

"Shh, I'm with you, I'm here, everything is going to be fine." He hushed her.

Another voice suddenly barged in the moment, "I heard some noise…. What the hell happened?" The other man's tone changed as he saw the sight before him.

Peter turned his head back slightly and said, "Murder attempt. Are you going to stand here and do nothing or call 911?"

The other man just rolled his eyes and picked up his phone. "Hi, my name is Josh Harvey; there has been a murder attempt… Yes, the person is fine… yes."

A trembling Cuddy couldn't stop staring at the inert body on the floor. The body of a man she would trust with her life and her heart.

_Pain in the horizon of an unconscious mind is what awaits who these helpful men had decided to refer to as Patient X._

* * *

_ So? Loved it? Hated it? Is that what you had in mind (about what would happen)? Do you think this story has potential? What do you think is going to happen? Let me know! xD and you'll get more ;)_


	6. Interrogation

This one was really hard to write because there's a lot that needs to be told and I mainly focused on the characters. I don't pretend I know the New Jersey Criminal justice process but in case I use some very specific things, I'll make sure I don't write unplausible stuff. I went to Law School so I think I might be able to not screw this up completely but that doesn't mean I'm going to make this extremely realistic, I'm pretty sure the law won't be too much inforced upon our characters. Anyway, we'll see how it goes but even though I'm not making this a step by step procedure with the characters stories aside, I'm going to do it properly.

* * *

**Chapter 6: Interrogation.**

An interrogation room was what his blurry vision had deciphered, concrete and a glassy window. House was waking up to the sound of people talking, 'We've found his wallet, and apparently he's a diagnostician at the same hospital of the victim.'

'That Peter guy who took her home says she is his employer.'

"Hey… can I have some water?" House asked with difficulty, thanks to his extremely dry mouth.

"Good, you're awake!" One of the person in the room stated so loud House thought his ears would burst into pieces.

"I'll go get him some water." The other man said, House only saw a glimpse of the man leaving but went as far as noticing him wink at the person seated in front of him.

House tried to raise him arms but realized he was handcuffed to his chair, "Why am I handcuffed?"

"Safety measures." Said the man who looked about forty years old; very tall and definitely looking like a cop this time. This time? Why would he think that? This situation felt strangely familiar.

"Right… you're a cop." House sighed, the man nodded, arms folded against his chest.

"So officer, what have I done this time?" House chuckled, "Did I insult a patient? Did I steal some vicodin prescriptions?"

"Wait, are you going to tell me you don't remember?" The cop tried to keep his composure, "Being tasered doesn't involve memory loss."

"Well, in my case it does and you should believe me, I'm a genius apparently!" House kept going but paused, "Wait a minute, I've been tasered?"

"If you're that much of a genius, why don't you try and remember the things you've done?" The cop played House, thinking the man was the worst liar he had ever seen.

"Because my diagnosis says it all: Memory loss." House kept going, "But you don't seem to be the boss here… Really, you can uncuff me, I won't tell your boss, and in fact I'm going to go outside and then talk to your boss, okay?" House tried, shaking his arms slightly.

The man opposite him rose up suddenly and grabbed the hem of House's shirt and yelled, "You motherfucker, you're going to stop pretending and spill your fucked up guts because you're nothing but a piece of shit to be a fucking murderer."

"What the-"House tried, seeing the man was a little too serious about this to be a miserable –or the joking-kind, subordinate he thought he was. He was in trouble and he started fearing the worse.

"That's right, you screw or rape whatever, a woman and then you want to kill her, has this always been your pattern, huh?" He paused, punching House in the face this time, the doctor's silence leading him to the edge, "ANSWER ME!" The cop tried to catch his breath, making him spill all the saliva he had in him on House, "How many other chicks have you fucking killed?"

House, who had been seriously considering fearing for his life, saw the cop whom he recognized as the one who had gone to get him some water, barge into the interrogation room, "LET HIM GO, JOHNSON!"

"I don't care that we only got life without parole in that state, I'll kill you myself!" Johnson yelled, his hold still firm on House.

"Johnson, I'm not going to say this a third time, let him go!" The other cop said calmly this time.

Johnson reluctantly let go of House and turned around to face the other cop, "I'm done with that piece of crap, he's all yours boss!" Johnson said, heading out.

"Johnson, patience, remember?" The cop said and the man who was trying his best to calm himself down, nodded, "It's hard, boss."

The older cop nodded yes and the younger cop left, without slamming the door shut to House's surprise.

"Well, that went well!" House put his sarcasm on the table, only maybe just a little too fast.

"I'm detective Norris." The man said, sitting down on the chair his colleague had previously used.

"Like the Chuck?" House asked, raising an eyebrow.

"Would that be a bad thing if I was related to the Chuck?" Norris asked, putting the bottle of water on the table.

"Obviously, you're not going to answer my questions directly because you're the smart cop. Your friend tried that a few minutes ago and it didn't work, I'm guessing you keep doing the same thing because you're more experienced." House eyed the man carefully.

"You're a complicated man, Dr House and even though this isn't a complicated case, I'm going to complete this assignment." Norris explained.

"Why am I being accused of murder?" House asked as he needed to clear some things out.

"Murder attempt, Dr. House. I'm sorry for you but thanks to her boyfriend, she didn't die." Norris claimed.

"What the hell are you talking about?!" House started yelling.

"Playing the mental illness card is tricky in front of a jury, Dr. House." Norris sighed, "You're not getting out of this. There are facts and witnesses."

House said nothing and hoped the man would keep on talking about this strange case, he was practically sure was similar to dementia.

"The physical exam confirmed her boyfriend's statement." He paused,"She hasn't talked except to yell a few times that you hadn't raped her, something the brutality of the act, that the exam revealed and that even foreplay doesn't always prevent, can't confirm."

House's eyes went wide from a complete state of confusion, "What are you talking about?" House spoke softly, unsure where his words would lead him for the first time in his life.

"You're a smart man, Dr. House." He said, "Help me here: was it a crime of passion?"

"What the fuck are you on about?" House expressed.

"Did you need to wash her sins by strangling her?" Norris pushed it, "Feel her sinful limbs break under your touch?

"I didn't strangle anyone for Christ's sake!" House yelled.

"So you don't remember sleeping with her and then putting those same hands that had caressed her on her neck and use all the misery that's inside to commit a crime?" He detailed.

"Who the hell are you talking about? Who is she?" House kept on yelling.

"Did you or did you not try to kill Dr. Lisa Cuddy by strangulation?" The cop finally spilled anger in his eyes.

This was all it had taken House to recall what had happened. They had slept together and then in an instant, frenzy came to him and he had put his hands around her neck and had forced them on it. House looked down at the table before him and closed his eyes, pressing on his eyelids like he was frowning. He shook his head in utter confusion and murmured 'no' a couple of times before Norris asked again, "Did you or did you not, Dr. House?"

All evidence was against him. House kept on shaking his head, opening his eyes, he still his head once and tilted it back. Facing forward the man and his accusations, he figured a confession since he could in fact see himself doing it, that terrifying act… could maybe buy him a couple of years in jail.

House eyed the detective, resigned to not twitch as he would say it, "I did."

"Good. Now we can proceed." The detective said, "Why did you do it?"

"What did Lisa say?" House asked.

"She said she couldn't believe you would ever go as far as even thinking about trying to kill someone." He paused, "She said you are in pain but that doesn't make you a murderer. She almost defended your act in a way, saying you have been going through a lot of things in the past few days."

"What do you think then?" House asked, never breaking the eye contact with the detective.

"I don't think you deserve so much love. However I don't believe she's a masochist. This is why in your defense, I'll say I believe her when she says your criminal record is clean –expect for the drug abuse in the past. But it wasn't what led you to do it, was it?" He finally asked.

"I wasn't high." House stated, "But I wasn't myself."

"I've heard that excuse before, Dr. House." He said, getting a pack of cigarette from his pocket, "Do you want one?"

"No. I don't smoke." He said, "And again, I wasn't high! I just have no memory of the events and only bare flashes of what I've been doing for the past five days or so!"

"You're the diagnostician; you should be able to figure yourself out before you go in front of a jury and get many years behind bars as an award!" The detective joked.

"Something is wrong with me… I was doing research…" House mumbled, blinking rapidly as his brain tried to register past events.

"At least you're being quite honest with yourself, Dr. House, I like that! A killer with a classy repentance, I could almost believe you're looking for answers behind your actions!" The detective kept pushing.

"ALL MY LIFE, ALL I'VE EVER WANTED TO DO TO THAT WOMAN WAS ACTUALLY SCREW HER PHYSICALLY AND SCREW WITH HER AT WORK!" House paused, "THIS… DETECTIVE IS AS PERVERSE AS MY MIND COULD GET AROUND HER!"

"And then you're going to tell me you had no intention of hurting her, is that right? That you love her and that you couldn't do that to the woman you've been in love with for years?" Norris asked, rolling his eyes.

"YES, THAT'S EXACTLY IT! EXCEPT I'VE NEVER SAID I LOVED HER!" House said before trying to regulate his breathing, "Something is doing this to me… maybe someone did something to me, I would never hurt Lisa Cuddy, ever. Idiots? Maybe but Lisa? No, I couldn't…" His voice trailed off. Her statement was there and so were his memories, there was no turning back but he had to figure out what was wrong with him. The only question was how? There was no way out.

Detective Norris simply sighed and said, "This is a delicate case Dr. House, you're saying you were under the influence of something and maybe you're right, maybe it's the best way for you to fight what is going to happen next."

"Except it's not looking good." House shook his head, "I need to talk to her." He practically begged.

"I don't think she wants to see you right now."He said, getting up from his chair and as he walked to the door and opened it, he stopped and stared at House for a few minutes, "Why haven't you asked for a lawyer?"

"What?" House expressed, slightly taken aback as he was already back on thought processing all the shit that was happening to him.

Norris frowned and added, "It's true that I didn't suggest you one but you're a doctor you know how these procedures work. You should be trying to defend yourself… and not be… this out of phase…"

"THIS IS INSANE!" House let his heart out.

"Maybe you're right, maybe pleading mental illness is a good strategy." He said, shaking his head as he headed out the interrogation room.

The last thing House heard before the two police officers came in to take him back to his cell were Norris' words to someone else, "That guy is insane."

* * *

Police officers took House back to his cell, all cops were staring and as if slow motion had been a natural movement, he couldn't help but gulp at the anger those men were feeling toward him. It was nothing compared to having plain idiots staring at him for being a bastard, it was actually painful for him to be looked at this way. He would walk feeling like a giant and worthless piece of shit and they were part of the reason why. He felt miserable; he had never wanted to kill himself but if there was one thing he couldn't help but think about at this very moment, was how to eventually do it. Pain suddenly had taken its toll.

Doors after doors, House and the officers walked every corridor and eventually arrived at the cells; they opened his and uncuffed him.

House looked at the guards and said, "Can I have my phone call now?"

"It's five in the morning, wait a couple of hours." The guard said before leaving.

* * *

"Johnson, I want you to call Jenny." Norris asked.

"She's still at the crime scene, right?" Johnson said, making his cell the lieutenant's cell.

"Yep, put it on speakers." Norris said.

"Lieutenant Walker."

The moment the cops that were present in the large office heard the lieutenant's voice, they all started Wolf Whistling. Norris rolled his eyes at his men and said, "Forget that ever happened. And for the rest of their lives they'll be left with their gun instead of their precious manhood, you've got my word."

"You know I don't mind, Dad." She said.

"DADDY'S GOT A HOT CHICK! I WANT MY OWN BOSS CHICK!" They all started chanting, well aware that the boss would want to kill them all. Through gritted teeth, he said, "You've got anything?"

"Don't worry Dad; they're only trying to annoy you." She paused, "Anyway, there's no need to call the forensics for this scene, and the only things I could find were some bourbon, General Hospital and the L Word DVDs, lots of books, a messy couch, an ashtray that was full as well as a pack of cigarette. Nothing imp-"she tried.

"Wait a minute, you're telling me this guy doesn't have the profile of a killer?" Johnson cut in.

"That's what I'm saying, Nick." She said.

"When did I give you the right to speak to her?" Norris said.

"Dad…" She said.

"This is exactly you should never date your boss!" Norris said.

"She's not my boss. We were partners!" Johnson retorted.

"It's the same thing since she's my daughter and that you didn't have the guts to be a man!" Norris said.

"Dad, why are you talking about my relationship with Nick?"

"I'm processing information, honey." Norris said.

"I need a smoke." Johnson said, getting one single cigarette from his pocket.

Norris stared at the cigarette and suddenly stopped Johnson from putting it in his mouth, "Where did you get that cigarette?"

"That Peter guy earlier, I'm sorry but I can't smoke your brand anymore boss." Johnson shrugged.

"Nick! I thought you had quit!" Jenny exclaimed.

"Well, I'm not dating you anymore so I have a right to get my old addiction back!" Johnson got slightly angry.

"You two shut up!"Norris said, "Jenny, during the interrogation, I offered House a cigarette, he said he didn't smoke."

"Well, he must have lied to you because these cigarettes are obviously his." Jenny expressed.

"We'll have to confirm that." Norris said.

"It's a simple case, dad." Jenny said, "The man's a drug addict and that certainly doesn't prevent him from smoking cigarettes."

"But why would he lie to me about that? He admitted trying to kill her, his confession was clear and still why would he lie about something as completely pointless as that?"

"You think too much, boss." Johnson said.

"Tomorrow morning, I'm coming to the crime scene." Norris said.

"Can I have my Lucky back?" Johnson puppy dog eyed his boss.

"What?" Norris said but finally got it, he looked at the cigarette closely, it was indeed a Lucky Strike.

"Jenny, about that pack of cigarette, what's the brand?" Norris asked, clearly serious.

"It's a … wait; it's back on the table… just give me two seconds… "She said moving from the front door to the table, "Lucky Strike."

* * *

Please, tell me what you think. Any opinions, any insights. :) I LOVE YOUR REVIEWS!!!! Lol! ;)


	7. Investigation

Thanks for all the reviews!

I'm working on the next chapter right now. :) I hope you'll like where this story is going. And I'm talking about the next chapter because some awaited confrontations willl take place. At least, I hope they're awaited, lol.

As usual, don't forget to keep reviewing!

* * *

**Chapter 7: Investigation.**

Around ten o'clock in the morning, House woke up from a dreamless sleep. His mind was on overload the minute he had opened his eyes. He was still in jail and the only two things he wanted to do were to be able to put the woman he had hurt in one final embrace before killing himself. Pathetic. He was pathetic but these were the motivation he needed to try and get out of the mess that was going on inside his brain. Ultimately, House felt he was doomed and that there would be no acceptable redemption, the outside world wouldn't even consider them anyway. House called the guard and said, "Can I have my phone call now?"

The guard nodded and opened House's cell. He handcuffed House and led him to the section phone booths.

"One call and no more than a few minutes so be quick and-"The guard did his job, by explaining the basics of this procedure.

"Yeah, okay… sure… whatever." House shook his head and picked up the phone. And without any hesitation dialed the one number he knew would make sense.

"Wilson." House heard Wilson say over the phone.

"Hey Jimmy, it's me." He said.

"House, I've been trying to reach you for over an hour!" Wilson expressed, "There are some guys going through your office right now. I'm pretty sure they're cops."

"And they're probably still searching my house as well." House let out.

"What is going on? Where are you?" Wilson asked, concerned.

"Is Cuddy in this morning…yet?" House asked, his voice fragile at the mention of her name.

"No, I tried calling her as well but she wouldn't pick up her phone. I've tried Peter's cell but I got nothing either. I mean she has to know if you're in trouble." Wilson replied.

House chuckled, "And me who thought you would always cover my ass."

"I would still do if you hadn't me worried these last couple of days!" Wilson expressed.

"Listen Jimmy-"House tried.

"Stop calling me Jimmy; it's scaring the crap out of me so you better spill out what you have to say right now because I seriously fear the worse." Wilson admitted.

"I'm in jail. The officer who's seated next to me will give you all the information you need in a matter of seconds." House paused, "However before he does and you decide to jump in your car and drive to see me, "He paused again, knowing perfectly the minute he would hear the news, Wilson wouldn't go straight to him, "I have to tell you myself that this was in no case my intention, yes I did it, yes it was me doing it but you know me, I mean you're my best friend…" House's voice was breaking and Wilson clearly didn't know what to say, the trembling voice coming from the big guy he considered one of the best jerks in the world making him flinch.

"What happened House?" Wilson asked, softly.

"I slept with Cuddy and then I… tried to kill Cuddy." House let out, resting his head against glassy door. The man still didn't believe what he had almost done.

"That's a joke, right?" Wilson paused, "You wanted me to pee or shit in my pants, you bastard!" He rolled his eyes and chuckled, "You really almost got me here, House! Funny, really." He paused again, "You better be at work within the next ten minutes or I'm going to tell these guys in your office where the hell your secret stashes with all sorts of drugs in them are!"

"Wilson…" House tried to shut his friend up.

"Buh-bye House, I'll see you soon." And Wilson hung up.

House hit the phone and the guard said, "Hey, you better calm down!"

"He hung up." House exclaimed, his arms were raised behind his head as he got out of the booth. "My best friend didn't fucking believe any words I've just said."

"Sometimes you just don't want to believe a human being could have done such a thing." The guard said, putting the handcuffs around House's wrists once more.

"If you're that wise, why did you become a police officer?" House couldn't contain himself.

"To avoid killing a piece of shit like you myself and risk just as much time in jail." The guard claimed.

"Well that makes you a wise and good cop." House sighed.

"My wife thinks so." The guard said, shrugging.

"Do you love your wife, officer?" House asked as the guard was taking him back to his cell.

"'Been married for thirty years and not a day goes by without me loving her." The guard had no trouble answering, "Why? You love the woman you've tried to kill?" The guard chuckled, "That really makes you one hell of a sick bastard, you know that?"

"I've known her for more than twenty years and not a day goes by without me loving her." House expressed, trying to negate with words the fact that his heart was breaking inside, "And instead of telling her something in me almost killed her… I've never been able to say it to her because I didn't believe it myself and because my goal in life has always been to be miserable…"

"What a great insight into the mind of psycho. Thanks, I'll put it in my notes." The guard said, putting House back in his cell, "I'll make sure she tells you how much she loves you while you're in jail, making it impossible for you to ever approach her again."

"I'm not who you think I am." House said, behind the bars, calling after the guard.

"And maybe I'm not a wise and good cop." The guard said, leaving the section, "Maybe it could work in your favor, you never know."

* * *

The guard came back to the Police Department offices and took the seat in front of Detective Norris, "You're going to have to call that Jimmy guy. The address and phone are in the database."

"You really think this is related to the Cole-Stevenson case?" Norris asked.

"Only sci-fi geeks like me think any murder attempt is related to the Cole-Stevenson case." The guard smirked, "Thanks for making sure he didn't get that precious phone call last night."

"How I thought about calling you the minute I figured the Lucky Strike thing goes beyond me." Norris shook his head in disbelief.

"Maybe it's because you think an FBI agent under cover is better than-"The guard tried.

"… Than his best friend of a detective who hasn't really given up on science-fiction." Norris finished his friend's sentence for him, "I get it." He nodded, "But you're going to investigate this your way anyway and I'm going to investigate my own way."

"I assume he's the bad guy and you assume he's the good guy. Nothing ever changes." The guard said.

"Things never change, Gale." Norris sighed.

Gale nodded, "But something has definitely changed for that man."

"What did you pick up on?" Norris asked.

"Some bits of the conversation seemed odd, I want to be there every time you interrogate him or the witnesses."He paused, "And I'll need to get a record of every conversation he'll have with that Jimmy guy."

"In the meantime you're going to…" Norris tried.

"Do my usual undercover stuff." Gale smiled.

"Maybe you're losing your time, maybe he really is just a pathetic killer." Norris shrugged.

"Maybe…but you know I can't help it every time I hear the name of the brand Lucky Strike in a murder attempt." Gale expressed.

"Exactly, how many times have you heard Lucky Strike?" Norris asked.

"Many times but it's the first time that it looks like that case; you can imagine how eager I am to be working on this." Gale smiled.

"You're obsessed." Norris said.

"I just want to be proven wrong before the guy's proven guilty." Gale said.

* * *

Wilson had received an alarming phone call from the Police Department a couple of minutes after he had hung up on an obviously stoned in his bastardogy House. Wilson had walked to men that had been looking through House's stuff in his office and asked them, his voice trailing off, "Are you the police?"

"Lieutenant Johnson and this is Lieutenant Walker, you are?" Nick Johnson asked Wilson.

"I'm Dr. James Wilson; I'm Dr. House's best friend." He said.

"I assume you've heard the news. I'm sorry." Jenny Walker said.

"Of course, we have to ask you for your cooperation in this." Nick acknowledged.

"Yeah…sure, okay." A completely stunned Wilson was trying to make sense out of all this.

"Have you noticed anything different about Dr. House recently?" Jenny asked Wilson.

"He's not a murderer." Wilson expressed.

"There are witnesses, Dr. Wilson and you know who the target was. Dr. Cuddy is also a witness and she's alive, thanks to Peter Lowell. "Nick explained.

"I have to… I have to see them."Wilson was forcing himself into thinking clearly.

"I understand this is difficult Dr. Wilson." Jenny put a reassuring hand on his shoulder, which annoyed Nick slightly, "But if you remember anything, even the smallest detail of all, please contact us." She looked back at Nick and he said, "Well, give him your number! I don't have my cards on me."

She rolled her eyes at him and gave Wilson her card, "Call us."She said and Wilson nodded and walked out of House's office.

"Seriously? 'Call us'?" Nick shook his head in disbelief, "This was more like a 'Call me Mr. Cute doctor!"

"So now you're jealous?" Jenny remarked.

"I've never said I wanted to let you go." He expressed, eyeing her carefully.

"But you did." She said and got back to searching the office.

* * *

Wilson jumped in his car and headed straight to Cuddy's place.

Once he had arrived he rushed to her door step and knocked a couple of times on the door. Nothing, no one would open it. He kept on knocking and eve started yelling, "Cuddy?"

Suddenly the door opened slowly, revealing Peter, "Hey Wilson."

"Where is she?" Wilson asked, "I have to see her."

"She's exhausted; she's not ready to see anyone." He said, calmly.

"But you?" Wilson remarked, slightly angry.

"I'm taking care of her so stop being such an ass." Peter expressed.

"You're right, I'm sorry but I need to talk to her. You know House, he could have never done something like that-"Wilson tried.

"I was there! He did it, I saw him, the police know!" He claimed.

"How come you were there by the way? How did you know she'd be at House's? What happened exactly for her to rush into House's arms in the first place?"

"I'm not a good guy Wilson which is why she ran to that… beast-"He tried.

"Don't call him that! He's a bastard, he's a jerk, he's an obnoxious ass but in no way is he a beast, you got it?" Wilson got mad.

"You better calm down, Wilson." Peter warned him, "I'm the one who is actually trying to repent himself here, I'm taking care of her, I'm going to help her through this because I love her and I'll give her all the fucking time in the world if I have to get her back."

"I want to see her." Wilson said.

"When she'll feel better, she'll come to you." Peter scratched his head, "I have to go back inside now."

"If I don't get to see her soon, I'll call the police." Wilson warned him, not trusting Peter's sudden protectiveness of Cuddy.

"I know you've never really liked me, Wilson-"

"You're right; I'm pretty good at faking, just like you." He said, before leaving.

Wilson got back into his car and took the lieutenant's card out of his pocket. He picked his cell and dialed Jenny Walker's number, "Hello again, this is Dr. Wilson. I want to see my friend and I think we should talk."

"Meet us at the PD in an hour." Jenny said over the phone.

"Okay." He said and drove off.

Peter came back inside and went to Cuddy's bedroom. She was curled up in a ball under the sheets on her bed. He wasn't lying; she was in a disastrous state, "Lisa?" He called after her softly.

"I'm okay just go." She said in between sobs, not looking at him.

"You know I'm here for you." He said.

"I know." She murmured.

"Okay. I'm going out for a smoke." He suddenly cursed himself for saying that.

"Since when you do smoke?" She asked, realizing she had never seen him smoke or smelled anything even remotely suspicious on him before.

"I used to but quit when I met you… you know dating a doctor an all." He tried to smile, "Do you mind?"

She chuckled, "No. Apparently everybody smoke now." She was thinking about House again.

"What do you mean?" He asked.

"Nothing." She said. He nodded and left the room.

The taste of his mouth lingered. But so was the look in his eyes. Before and after. Her neck was bruised and she still couldn't allow herself to touch it. She has always been in so deep for him, she didn't understand. She wanted to confront him; she wanted to know why he would do such a thing. She had never been the greatest fighter in relationships but for him, she would be. She wanted an answer. Had she been blind all these years? That the man was in fact completely insane, mentally sick? Were all the drugs in his body the reason? What were the things happening to him every time he would disappear out of her life? She was crying and crying over and over again, cursing herself for falling for a man who had abused her verbally all those years. She had told him she loved him for Christ's sake, he had wanted her to say it and then what? He asked her to leave and because she wouldn't, he became violent and tried to… She can't even think about it, the look in his eyes had changed; he was someone she had never seen before, saying the action he was performing, "I'm killing you." She remembered him say. Was he in control of what he was doing? She didn't know but his hands on her felt like he was and unless she had been dreaming, he wasn't trying to hold himself back.

The taste from his mouth still lingered though and did she have to let it linger? She never wanted that feeling go away, the moment she told him she loved him so much. These exact same words that had triggered that change in him. She had never liked gentle, which was what she wanted but not what she needed. He had been rough but tender at the same time, making her feel whole and just the way she wanted to be. And she could have sworn he had felt the same way. Maybe that was it; maybe he just couldn't handle it. Being with her went against everything his miserable self believed in. Maybe… if Peter hadn't come to her rescue he would have stopped himself from strangling her all the way to her end. She would never know but she wanted to know, she had to ask him. As much as she hated him that moment, his taste, his smell, his entire being, the being she was in love with lingered and she couldn't let go. She wouldn't be able to let go of him. People are right when they say being addicted will certainly kill you if this addiction is dangerous. But that addiction had hurt her and she would need to detox. Facing your addiction and accepting the disaster it causes are the first steps to recovery.

Outside Cuddy's house, Peter was smoking his cigarette when a car stopped by. Josh walked out of his car and met his friend at the doorstep, "Hey." He greeted him, giving Josh a metal briefcase.

"So, how is she?" Josh asked, taking the briefcase.

"Why do you care?" Peter asked.

"You really have no heart?" Josh expressed.

"You didn't seem to care before…" He paused, "And by the way, saying 'hi' when you called the cops last night? That wasn't a good move; I had to tell them you were quite shocked by the sight before you."

"I didn't!" Josh claimed, "Except when I saw the scene, that was psychologically unsustainable… knowing that I'm part of the reason why that happened."

"She wanted a man like him, she got what she deserved." Peter shrugged.

"Just because your dad felt your mother-"Josh tried.

"And my dad was right. Mom was a whore and she got what she deserved." Peter was final.

"Yeah, that explains why he went nuts and shot himself in the head." Josh laughed, "Oh yeah the man was happy with what he had done!"

"You got your money and your Electronic Bypass Exhilarating Frequency now!" Peter threw his cigarette to the ground and smashed it, "It works and the job is done, you have your scientific discovery."

"Except I wanted to exploit the EBXF for healthy scientific purpose." Josh explained, "Not to kill people. There is no way I'm going to be able to use this technology righteously now. People will get suspicious. Only killers, mobs, terrorists or arms dealer will want the EBXF…"

"It's a stupid way to call it anyway."Peter said, ready to go back inside.

"Oh but the mystery that surrounds all this, it's exciting isn't it?" Josh asked him, "It's really throwing me off that you want this to become the greatest psycho story in the history of psycho stories."

"I'll get back to you on that in thirty years, when Lisa Cuddy and I have our three beautiful children-" He said.

"So she can be miserable all her life, hating you, hating having to sleep with you and even possibly hating your kids?" Josh shook his head, "The perfect American life, is that it?"

"Nah, she loves sex and she'll love her kids." Peter expressed, "And I'll be the only man she trusts, except I'm the man who will have led her to her downfall."

"You want her to be rendered completely insane." Josh explained, shocked.

"I want to be able to witness what my dad never had the guts to. Watching his wife suffer and at his complete mercy. Even though all he had ever wanted was for her to love him back." He claimed.

"He has never been the monster and you the bastard…"Josh paused, "It's you. You're the monster."

"Don't people say men look for their mother in their girlfriends?" Peter raised an eyebrow, smirking.

"You're a miserable psychiatrist for fuck's sake…" Josh tried.

"Even better, she's going to get all my attention from now on." He smiled before coming back into her house, slamming the door shut in Josh's face.

Josh was stressed, he had his money but he couldn't believe what that poor woman would go through. He walked back to his car, unaware of the fact that someone across the street had noticed the entire conversation that had took place.

* * *


	8. Confrontation

Okay, this one is a little bit inspired by Blade Runner as you'll see and by the way in the Video Game adaptation of the movie, it was Lisa Edelstein who did the voice for the sexy character of Crystal Steel. xD (and yes i used to love that game when I was 13, God that was a long time ago, lol, I'm old!).

Anyway, I think this one is going to make you love me and hate me at once. I'm posting this one fast because I don't have time to go through my typos or unacceptable grammar again, so all my apologies in advance but at least you get that one fast before the next one that I will likely upload tomorrow!

AND NOW, I want you to read it and review some more! Woohoo! xD

* * *

**Chapter 8: Confrontation.**

"We've found nothing, except loads of bottles of Vicodin." Jenny said, meeting her father halfway in the PD's hall, "No cigarette packs, nothing except the painkiller he uses for his leg."

"I've asked Brandon to search through his Credit card records and bank statements, thanks to the warrant you got us." Josh paused, "The only time he bought cigarettes was 4 days ago. Before that –and he went back more than a year or so, he has never bought any cigarettes."

"I told you something was very wrong with this case." Norris said, "Good job."

"Sorry but that doesn't give us much, I only did all this because you're my boss." Nick said, "It's unnecessary, the guy is a killer. I don't need more proof than what happened."

"Nick…" Jenny tried to stop him from acting like an idiot again.

"We have to make sure we don't miss out on anything." Norris said.

"No, Jenny. I have a right to explain myself. Your dad thinks this case is related to an old case of his." Nick said, "Yes, I know about the case, I respect you immensely but Lucky Strike doesn't stand for Crime of Passion."

"You don't know what you're talking about and for the record; it was never a case or my case for that matter until my conclusions were proven wrong by Gale!" Norris explained, "Now you are an excellent Lieutenant Nick, you'll become a great detective someday if you follow that road but you don't get to try and screw me as being an old senile ready for retirement, got it?"

"Dad, please. You know he just hates the FBI. That's why he doesn't like the fact that Gale is on this as well." She tried to calm both her father and ex-boyfriend down, "And you Nick, you have got to be open to any possibilities… I mean, that House is probably going to end up in jail anyway." She added, putting a hand on his shoulder, the look they exchanged reminding the lieutenant how much he wanted that woman back in his life.

A voice interrupted the moment, "Dr. Wilson is here, Sir."

Norris woke up from the touching moment a woman had just brought to his eyes and said, "Well, let's go get some coffee. I want him in the interrogation room now." He told the officer.

* * *

Cuddy eventually got out of bed and headed for the bathroom, completely absent from her body after so much thinking that had led to some more crying, she delicately freed herself from her clothes. She hadn't changed; these were her clothes from the previous night. She took them off one by one and threw them to the ground. The moment she had entered her bathroom she was naked and came closer to the mirror above the sink. She tried to pull herself together and eyed the bruises on her neck, trying not to break into tears at the sight that reminded her of the strength the man she loves had tried to kill her with. She shook her head, disbelieving his actions, her faith in him, everything their relationship was based on. At loss of tears, she figured she needed a clean state and got on her tub and started the shower. She finally put her hands on her sensible neck and started massaging it.

Peter heard the shower running and went straight to the bathroom, he slowly came in and hadn't even bothered to take his clothes off that he had jumped in the shower. His fully dressed self startled her a little, she didn't turn around. In a reassuring manner he put his hands on her hips, watching the beauty that she was from her feet to her bruised neck. She instinctively put her hands on his but couldn't speak, his gesture inconveniencing her completely.

"I know you want me to get out and go away but I want you no harm." He said, caressing her chest and put his chin slowly on her left shoulder. He could tell her heart was beating fast, she was vulnerable and it aroused him even more, "I just need you to understand that I'm here for you."

She closed her eyes and eventually spoke, "I'm going to go to the Police Department again." She paused, "I have to."

She let go of her hold on his hands, a way to show him he could trust her. Gaining the trust of a shrink is never easy, especially when most of the time, the shrink is the one who knows what he's doing. She was playing with fire, with a man she had always had real issues with –still, he had saved and helped her. His hands hadn't been moving which obviously gave her apprehensions as to what his reaction would be. Eventually, though, he started roaming his hands on her body ans whispered to her ear, "Okay." He stopped his hands just beneath her breasts and kissed her neck. She remained still until he was gone. She was the property of no man but with what had happened to her, she had come to realize she was starting to fear this man, maybe all men, however since he was the closest to her that very moment, she couldn't just try and be the independent woman she had always been. She owed him for saving her life and that was the frightening part. She would be used and this was such a vulnerable moment for her.

* * *

"Thanks for getting in contact with us Dr. Wilson." Norris said, entering the interrogation room with Jenny and Nick, "I know you're not a witness in this investigation but I like this room."

"I know there's someone behind that glassy window, you know?" Wilson said, smiling.

"Well in fact, this time there isn't. Besides, I'm better than another man could be behind a glassy window, trying to decipher your every move, even a slight twitch of the lips." Norris assured him, "Who wants coffee?"

"No thanks." Jenny refused politely.

"Yes please." Wilson said, accepting a cup, "Thank you."

"Nick?" Norris asked and Nick accepted one as well.

"So, let's get this over with."Norris said, sitting down, while Jenny and Nick would observe from behind him, "How long have you known Dr. House."

"About fifteen years. We've met at a bar and he was the perfect jerk." Wilson smiled at the thought, "We've been best friends ever since."

"Have you ever thought Dr. House to be a dangerous man?" Norris asked.

"With patients? He has done some stupid things to get to the truth. He doesn't have the Messiah complex most doctors have, he has the Rubik's complex -"

"He needs to solve puzzles." Norris sighed.

"I can see you might have noticed that in him already." Wilson said.

"Yes but I'd say he is a bit lost right now. Do you think his drug addiction would be reason enough for him to become violent like this?"

"No. When House was forced to stop taking his vicodin –Cuddy would only give him small dosage, he got violent but only verbally. And as far as I know, he hasn't been on Vicodin withdrawal for the last few days. He was different, I'll give you that, even I felt there was something very wrong with him but it wasn't because of the Vicodin. He was still taking it and even if I hadn't seen him take any, I would have known because a doctor really can't miss House's symptom of withdrawal, they are pretty charismatic."

"I see. What is the exact extent of the relationship between Dr. House and Dr. Cuddy?"

"Honestly? They're idiots. They've been in love with each other for years. They met in college, she became his attending doctor when he realized he had been misdiagnosed the first time and a couple of months after the infarction she had become Dean of Medicine and she hired him, creating a whole department for him."

"Romantically, how has it been for them?"

"They've mostly had numerous one night stands. He was never ready for a relationship because House doesn't do happy. He doesn't trust himself to be the one for her and she… well, she understands that but that doesn't mean she has given up on the thought."

"Well after what happened last night, I'm pretty sure she has given up on it by now." Nick cut in.

"Shut up…" Jenny warned him.

"Continue." Norris said, knowing the man was on a roll.

"You see, I don't think this is really relevant since it's my opinion but right now, Cuddy's probably in a state of complete shock because we both know House would have never done such a thing. I mean it's impossible, the man –even though he hates to admit it, saves lives, he doesn't take them away and especially not Lisa Cuddy's. I went to her House earlier and Peter prevented me from getting in. He said he was taking care of her. He has no right to shut me out of her life like this, I'm her friend!"

"Do you think it's strange that he's doing this?" Norris asked.

"Even if it wasn't, I just don't like it." Wilson admitted, "He is being extremely protective and I'm sorry but if Cuddy went to House's place last night it must have been because she didn't want to see his face."

"What do you mean?" Jenny asked.

"The man is a cheater and she knows it." Wilson paused, "His promise to her had been to tell her the truth if he had a relapse and cheated on her. If he has, you got your reason why she went straight to House. He's the only man she trusts."

"Regarding House's change… what you've noticed in the last few days-"Norris tried.

"The people working under him told me this morning that he hadn't showed up for his CT scan that was scheduled at 9. This means he was going to run some tests on himself." Wilson explained, "Except now, he never has. Maybe, I don't know, maybe he had figured something out."

"I don't think he has." Norris said, "Anyway, I have one last question for you Dr. Wilson and then you can go see him."

"Shoot." Wilson said.

"Does Dr. House smoke Lucky Strikes?" Norris asked.

"House doesn't smoke, I saw him smoke some two days ago and he said he had suddenly developed an addiction but never in the fifteen years I've known him have I ever seen him smoke cigarettes."

"Suddenly?" Norris repeated after Wilson.

"Yep, you know the guy actually disappeared for three days! We had no idea where he was, Cuddy was freaking out and Peter was just…" Wilson paused.

"Peter what, Dr. Wilson?" Norris asked.

"He just… well, of course he didn't care he hates House's guts because he knows what a threat he will always been to him. He's a psychiatrist and has offered to take care of House's mental suffering many times, if you get my drift." Wilson remarked.

"Are you implying there could be some sort of set up against House here?" Nick asked.

"I just… I don't know, what he did to Cuddy he did… obviously, but what if there was something more to it than it is on the surface?" Wilson asked.

"Boss, this man is obviously trying to protect his friend by extrapolating on things that might have or might have not happened and I'm sorry but unless House is insane or has been paid to try and kill Dr. Cuddy, there is nothing that will make him escape jail. He will go to jail because he willingly assaulted her." Nick explained.

"Nick." Jenny turned to face him, "You're right there's probably not much that can be done for this man but don't you think Dr. Cuddy deserves the reasons behind this? Even if he's crazy. If a man had done this to me, wouldn't you want to know? I know I would." She smiled at him, "And I know I'm using your soft spot for me here."

"You two are cute. You remind me of House and Cuddy in a way." Wilson said, all nostalgic now.

"I'm not like that man!" Nick retorted, eyeing Wilson dangerously.

"On the contrary, Nick." Norris came in, "He's right, you're probably the one who would answer the man's behavior the most. You react on hunches, impulses and you want to prove yourself right, but you secretly want to prove yourself wrong."Norris paused, "You're just like him and it's a good quality, just… never raise a hand at my daughter or I'll kill you."

"Dad, you really think that's funny? Especially in front of Dr. Wilson?"Jenny cut in.

"You're right, I'm sorry." He apologized, "Dr. Wilson, Nick is going to take you to your friend's cell."

* * *

They all came out of the interrogation room and Jenny and her father went back to the hall, "Do you really believe I can find more to this, hon?" Norris asked her daughter.

"Dad, I know that you would never have contacted Gale to work on this case if you didn't believe that there was something more to it. Besides, I can't go against your decision. I know you want more excitement than just a simple murder attempt these days, I can't blame you."

"Is this because I'm retiring soon that you are being this nice to me?" Norris questioned her.

"No, it's because you've always told me once that every case is a cold case, no matter what the verdict is and that it has to stay-"

"Warm as long as possible." He smiled at his daughter, smiling.

"Exactly." She said, giving him a quick peck on the cheek.

* * *

"You've got a visit." Nick said, walking towards House's cell. House tilted his head back and saw Wilson.

"Hey buddy." Wilson said.

"Thank you moron, you can go away now." House told Nick.

"Sorry House but I've got to make sure he doesn't help you escape. I wouldn't want you to kill someone this time." Nick stayed in place on the wall opposite the bars and folded his arms.

House sighed and said, "Good! Great! Wilson you should call the hookers now, I'm sure he hasn't got a good fuck in months, that's why he's so pissed at the fact that I fucked my girl last night...maybe he'd like to know how it feels like to try and kill his girl and then get screwed by guys like him in a fucking police department!"

"House…" Wilson tried.

"Yes, I'm insane! I'm so messed up right now that I think I could try to kill someone else! Come on lover-cop, bring me another girl to fuck so I can give you the proof that I'm a psycho serial killer-"

"Stop messing with me, House. I can contain myself." Nick explained. The man had remained impassible.

Wilson turned to Nick and said, "It's a game, my advice to you is, shut up or play."

"I know he's going to try and win, either way." Nick said.

"I'm trying to explain this fucked up situation but you know better, don't you? You know that I'm lying to myself-"House kept going.

"House, stop now!" Wilson cut in.

" Oh but he wants me to act insane because he is a hundred percent sure that I'm just another sociopath who has finally found his calling last night, isn't that right Johnson?"

"Everybody lies." Nick simply said.

House stopped himself and started laughing and Wilson rolled his eyes.

"What?" Nick asked, incredulous.

"Finally, I'm going to be able to stop thinking of you as an idiot!" House eyed Lieutenant Nick Johnson carefully, "You're good!"

"He likes you." Wilson said to Nick.

"I suggest you invite him for our next Poker game." House paused, "In jail that is!"

"I'm not going to ask you how you are because it's obvious you can't be feeling too well right now." Wilson acknowledged.

"No kidding." House said as he started pacing around his cell.

"I just want you to know that I'm going to help you through this and that I'm going to do anything in my power –and so will these guys, "Wilson turned to Nick when said it, "to make sure this case isn't definite."

"I've fucking hurt her, Wilson!" House yelled, "I don't see how this can be explained. The act is there, facts and witnesses in the police's pocket; a jury will never believe me when I tell them: "Oh, I'm sorry, I couldn't control my action, and I was strangling the one woman I care about even though I didn't want to." He sighed, "Even those guys you trust don't believe me."

"You don't know that." Wilson explained.

"Look at him, Wilson." House stopped pacing and raised his arm to point at Nick.

"He's right, we don't, only Norris sort of does." Nick shrugged.

"Well, I do believe you."Wilson assured.

"Have you… seen her?" House asked, calming himself down slightly.

"Not yet. Peter wouldn't let me in." Wilson admitted.

"That bastard, I swear to God if I ever get out of this, I'll taser him myself." House expressed.

"Saying things like that isn't going to help you, House." Wilson claimed, "Try and act like a human being for a change!"

"This Wilson is as close as being a human being I'll ever get. I don't want that asshole to be within a thousand miles away, but he's in her house as we speak and I'm sorry for reacting like a protective human being at the fucking moment."

"You know you're in control of what comes in and out of your mouth, House."

"So I'm wrong about this too?" House explained, "Fuck me for being so bad at reacting to basic human emotions!" House stopped himself, something coming back to him.

_I'm not in control here, so why should I?_

_This is where you're wrong. You're in control of what comes in and out of your mouth._

A memory of a man with no face, and a cigarette…Dave, he had asked him to call him Dave.

"Why would you say 'in'? Wilson asked, not really getting the 'in' part except for some really drastic sexual innuendos.

"It's a devilish joke my ex-psychiatrist used to say; at least I think it's a joke." Nick explained, "It means your emotions come in as a breath and you have to inhale it, as if digesting it, just like you'd kiss a woman and then let only ,what's thought through and useful, out."

Wilson turned back to House who had remained silent, "House, are you okay?"

"I think I know what happened those three days I went missing." House paused, "I think I've been kidnapped."

Wilson turned back to Nick with a dumbfounded look, "Well, speaking of the devil." Nick said, intrigued.

* * *

Josh had gone to a video store that afternoon; he was reading a comic book when a man of about 50 years old came inside. The man started pacing around the store. Josh eyed the man who was looking at the Sci-Fi DVDs shelf carefully, "May I help you, sir?" He asked.

"In fact, yes." The man replied. Josh moved in the direction of the man. "I'd like to know if you have Blade Runner, the first Director's Cut edition from 1997."

"I'm sorry, we don't. We only got the last edition." Josh said.

"Argh. Too bad because you see, I collect all Blade Runner products and that one is the only one I don't have."

"Hehe, nice to see a connoisseur!" Josh smiled at the man, "You also know that the popularity of the movie made it one of the first movie to go straight to DVD back in the days."

"When people talk about Science Fiction, if they have never seen that movie, they've seen nothing, right?" The man smiled back.

"Exactly! And that movie was one of the reasons why I did all my best to get into the MIT!" Josh exclaimed, happy to have found a smart geeky customer for once.

"You went to MIT? Impressive!" The man appreciated, "What are you thirty years old? Thirty five?"

"Yep, thirty five!" Josh admitted.

"Can you tell me what a smart man such as you is still doing, working at a video store?"

"I'll be out of here soon. Tomorrow actually, I just gave my boss my letter of resignation." Josh smiled proudly.

"Good for you." The man said, "I assume you've played the Blade Runner game from 1996 as well."

"Duh! That was like the best game ever at the time, after my lectures I would go back to my dorm and play on my computer instead of working on my papers, but surprisingly it never got me grades under Bs." Josh told him.

"You probably wished you could have ended the game in Crystal Steel's bed, right?" The man asked, raising the eyebrow. The answer was obvious anyway.

"Like most men on the planet, hehe." Josh smiled, "How come you know about that game, I mean not to be offensive but you don't seem like the kind of guy who plays video games."

"I don't but that one I did because the enigmas and getting those insights on the Replicants, I mean the universe was completely different, but God, the adrenaline, it was just too good." He paused, "Can you imagine being a biorobotic person that develops itself to the point where artificial intelligence transforms into what could be considered a compromise between a human being and a machine? And I mean that on what was supposed to be a machine in the first place."

"Wow, you know an awful lot and yes, I completely agree with you. This movie was such an inspiration for me and the graphics in it as well as the video games almost fifteen years later were-"Josh tried, overjoyed.

"Oh yeah the graphics, definitely and that Crystal character that was only in the game, I mean I was just like you even though I've been married for thirty years-"

"Hehe, funny you should say that! One of my best friends, at the time who chose to major in psychiatry –even though he had no desire to, has never smoked any other brands of cigarettes but Lucky strike since he virtually met Crystal, if you get my drift." Josh waggled his eyebrows.

"What do you mean by 'even though he had no desire to'?" The man asked.

"Well, it was sort of personal, a tragedy in his family. Apparently his dad had started an addiction to cigarettes and he would only buy Lucky Strike before he shot himself."

"That's tragic." The man expressed.

"Yep." Josh looked down.

"Now would you mind telling me what's inside that metal briefcase your friend, Peter gave you?" The man asked, definitely not kidding.

"What the-"Josh tried, "Who are you?"

"Me? I'm just a Blade Runner fan who thinks Lucky Strike is a very important brand in this suspicious and almost Sci-Fi-ish case of murder attempt on the person of Lisa Cuddy." The man said, "I'm going to have to ask you to come with me."

"Shit."Josh let out, without realizing that in this insane story, this was the last thing he should have said.

"That you have a right to say." The man smiled as he handcuffed Josh, that simple word letting him know he was onto something.

* * *

Peter had drove Cuddy to the Police Department, she insisted that he stayed in the car while she would be inside. He didn't like that but eventually and reluctantly told her he wouldn't interfere with her 'recovering process' as he'd put it –as a joke, of course. A joke… that honestly, wasn't one, definitely not to her liking.

Her footsteps were slow as she walked inside the hall and saw Wilson talking to police officers, the tension inside her soften the moment his warm eyes met hers, it was the first honest and living breath that had come out of her mouth in the past couple of hours.

"Cuddy…" Wilson let out as he left the lieutenants alone to go see her. He instinctively put his arms around her –only carefully not to startle her too much. She gave him back his embrace, enjoying every second of it. That was what she had needed, the warmth of a close friend. She had apprehended that moment when she would see the face of his best friend but surprisingly, the relationship between him and House couldn't make hers with Wilson fall apart completely, "Lisa, are you okay?" He said caressing the back of her head, "I'm okay, James." He let go of his hold on her and said, "You don't have to lie to me but I appreciate the need for a casual social talk." He tried to smile at her.

"Did you… hm… did you see him?" She asked, uncertain.

"Yes." He nodded; "You're here to…" he tried.

"Yes." She admitted, "I have to know."

"And by knowing you mean seeing, right?" Wilson asked, not sure this was a good idea for her, after all, House had admitted doing what he did and she was the first witness because the first witness is always the victim.

"Dr. Cuddy?" Detective Norris whom had been called by his two favorite lieutenants came closer to them, "What are you doing here? You should be at home resting."

"Hello, Mr. Norris." She said and nodded hi to Nick and Jenny.

"I'm Lieutenant Walker, I work on the case and this is Lieutenant Nick Johnson." Jenny came forward and Nick nodded.

"I have to see him, detective." She said.

"I really don't think this is such a good idea, Dr. Cuddy."

"He's going to go to jail anyway and I don't want to have to wait for his trial to see him because I might not be able to face him." She said.

"You want to face him outside the context of a trial to not be reminded of what he did to you?" Norris expressed and Cuddy sort of nodded, "You're wrong Dr. Cuddy, this won't make it easier for you. If that's the ultimate reason, it won't-"He tried.

"You're right, it's not the main reason but I've been thinking about this all day and I've… made my decision, I have to see him, before my own eyes, I know his words will get to me but at least I'll be untouchable to him."

"Wow, you guys really are mental!" Jenny came in, they all looked at her, a little shocked, "Woopsie, sorry!"

"Jenny will take you to him."

"I need to be alone with him." She asked.

"He's in a closed part of the facility, which means he's alone in his cell and there aren't any other prisoners around." Norris paused, "Jenny will stay close by, just in case though."

"I'll be right outside." Jenny nodded.

"Okay." Cuddy said.

"Lisa, are you sure-"Wilson tried again.

"How was he when you saw him?" She asked, cutting him off.

Wilson sighed, knowing he wouldn't be able to change her mind, "He's bad."

"Let's go." Jenny said, asking Cuddy to come with her.

* * *

Verdict? *evil laughter* LOL


	9. Summation

Sorry for taking more than three days to write that part but the uni strike is sort of over so I have tones of studying to do and I don't have as much time because I need to prepare for my finals. BUT, I'll upload more in the next few days.

It's 4:40 in the morning and that chapter is really long! I didn't take the time to read it again and check the spelling, typos and grammar issues and in the end you'll be the judge of it. If there are any inconsistencies, please let me know because I can't remember all the single details even though I go through the entire fic all the time to check on these same small details. (ps. I used to upload my documents in docx which is why in most chapters there are severly wrong typos that aren't mine, it's the uploader that screws with the letters, lol -at least, I'm pretty sure it is.)

**And now the big chapter! Please give me loads of reviews and love or hate or w/e but mostly love please, lol. :) **

* * *

**Chapter 9: Summation.**

House's day hasn't been an easy one up until the moment flashes of memories re-appeared. As if his brain was set to normal again, he couldn't help but focus on that interrogation room he supposedly has been in. If that man had abducted him, he needed to recall as much details as possible but to his regret, the entire situation was still a blurry mess to him. Maybe, just maybe, there was a correlation to what he almost did and his kidnappers.

He wanted to be told there would be more Saturdays. Being reminded of that simple day of the weekend made House try to look through different eyes, positivity was what he needed in order to get his memory back. There are things that can't be fought against, you can remember something but you can never destroy it.

There are things that can't be fought against, really. He should hate her, all of her, because at least that way, he wouldn't have to try and find some excuse for his behavior. But he just can't, he loves her and if he could get one of these Saturdays back with her, he would never let her go. House used to have a sleeping pattern with her and every time they had done it, the morning would feel like a Saturday morning. As a kid, House loved Saturday because it was the day he could put his mind at rest most of the time, his work used to be done and he could do everything he wanted, the sun used to shine but if it didn't, the bad weather wasn't an issue because his head and heart were at peace, pretending the sun was warming them. The warmth he was looking for, only Saturdays could bring. But along the years, the warmth had disappeared and one day, he realized the warmth had moved from the star that is the sun to a darker place. A place such as dark and miserable as him: Lisa Cuddy. She had become his Saturday and that Saturday had no place in the week or weekend, every single glimpse of her was a Saturday. A Saturday on a Monday morning when she would come and yell at him for the fact that he just wouldn't do his clinic duty, a Monday night coming from some clicking of heels afar. If the rest of his seconds, hours and days were nothing but merciless days, he would try to remember his Saturday, the Saturday she had become to him.

House lay on his back on his mattress and heard someone come inside the Cells room; he didn't bother to open his eyes and see who it was, as he was trying to form the sound of heels clicking in his mind.

House didn't hear the person speak and he kept trying not to be bothered by it but the clicking that had form couldn't last because that silence was almost deafening. The atmosphere increased in it density and House had to let it out, "If whoever you are, are here to tell me I'm going to spend a lot of time in jail, there's no need, I've already picked out the wallpaper." He hoped this would either make the person go away or speak, but this was getting absurd, "Seriously, just leave-"He stopped himself as he opened his eyes. Eyes wide with a look that exposed more fear than what was possible coming from a man like him, he also swallowed his saliva along his pride.

There she was standing before his own private bars that closed the cell, her face was facing down. The man without the cane rose up with some difficulty from his mattress, his knees obviously shaking, "Cuddy…" He tried, as he walked closer to where she was standing.

"Don't get any closer, House." She warned him, still looking down.

But House wouldn't hear it and slowly kept on walking, never allowing himself to not face forward, "I can't." He said.

"If you have anything left of a feeling for me, you have to give me a moment here." She was the one swallowing her saliva this time, "Please." She said.

"Well, I need a moment too." He admitted.

They both remained in silence for some everlasting seconds until House broke it, "Why are you here?"

She eventually tilted her head back and faced him, her eyes switching from a glimpse of an emotionally stuffed look to an angry one, "That's a question I've heard a lot from you." She said, "Along with the verb 'leave'."

House's eyes were fixating hers, like glued to something he couldn't penetrate, "You can't always see through me, just like I can't always see through you." He paused, "Just like now."

"I have no more desire to see right through you, House." She expressed, a tear forming in her right eye, as it started trailing slowly on he cheek, House couldn't help but say it, "I'm sorry."

"Really?" She said, raising an eyebrow, her tears intensifying her blue eyes, "How is that petty word supposed to convince me?" She let out, even though she knew the word wasn't a trivial one.

"Because there is nothing else that can be said. I can't do anything and most of all I can't take back what my hands have done to you." He practically yelled, pain devouring him. He hated the tone in his voice.

"They are your hands, House!" She yelled back, uncontrollably.

"I know that." He paused, trying to calm himself down, "Don't you think I know that?" His voice trailed off. Hadn't he been behind bars, he would have certainly cut his hands off if he could, and not metaphorically. They were worse of a pain than his bad leg ever since those events.

He started pacing around again. He wanted her to say something but she wanted him to speak first. Prior to coming in here, she knew what she wanted: to confront him. She was in it all that very moment and she couldn't think of a reason why she had come in the first place – it wasn't to check on him, it was definitely not to make herself feel better. It was simply the need to know.

House stopped pacing and suddenly moved to the bars and grabbed them with his hands, she could see that he was gripping them harshly and that sent her down memory lane, the good memories and the bad memory. She was surprised she didn't have more than one bad memory: obviously, it was the memory that had destroyed everything between them.

"Talk to me!" He spoke through gritted teeth, "Say something, say you hate me, say you can't believe it, say that it hurts so much you can't even bear to look me in the eyes." He said that, not proud of the fact that she could still look him in the eyes. He didn't deserve it but he admired her struggled, she was above him. She had always been.

She sighed and simply asked, "Why?"

House looked up at the ceiling, pain blossoming in his entire body. Reaching his eyes, he felt tears coming. A man crying has always been a terrible thing to see and House considered the fact that she would probably feel cheated by it. He was an asshole to let it all out now, why cry now when he could have cried so many years ago?

"I don't know." He said in between a sob or two.

"What?" She asked, anger rising in her tone as she accentuated the word at its peak.

"I don't know!" He repeated, louder this time, "I don't fucking now, one minute I was with you and feeling good about everything for fuck only knows in about how long and then I… I…" His voice trailed off again.

"You decided Lisa Cuddy had no right to live anymore?" She asked, fearlessly.

"I didn't decide for anything!" He retorted, sweat taking over his entire skin, flooding him with a bitter taste of disdain for the man he was, "It just happened." He regretted saying this the second he uttered it.

"'It just happened'?"She quoted him coming closer to the bars, "Like what, a voice asked you to do it?"

"No, Cuddy!" He said, "It wasn't me!"

"I was the one being hurt House!" She expressed.

"It was me, it just wasn't me."He paused, "Please just hear me; you know I would never try to hurt you! In the past I've known no boundaries as to where I could go emotionally but physically hurt you? I could never do that to you." He tried to catch his breath and as he noticed the look in her eyes had soften he didn't think twice before trying to touch her fingers that had rested on the bars, not too far from his hands. He put his hand on the other end, wishing their palms could touch. Cuddy's eyes wouldn't leave his and the moment she felt the tip of his fingers touch hers, she flinched slightly but let the contact live on. "It takes a lot of will to stay alive knowing what I've done." He said, his fingers trailing on her hers, roaming around until they reached the back of her hand. The touch on her hand felt so honest she didn't know where she was anymore, as if put under his spell once again she closed her eyes, enjoying the man she has always known just a little too much. He extended his arms so that he could caress hers and he eventually gripped hers slowly. As much as he was certain he hadn't done it willingly, he needed her forgiveness and so led her arm and the palm of her hand to his jugular. She opened her eyes again and the attraction his eyes had on hers, hypnotized her entire self, leaving it to what was left of him. She could feel his strong pulse and firm in his convictions he said, "The only reason it's still beating is because I need you to forgive me." He paused, she shot him a look that said 'What are you trying to accomplish by having my hand if not the both of them around your neck?'Realization that as much as she didn't want this to be a mind game from him, she couldn't stop herself from escaping his sensitive hold on her and she in an instant, pulled back. "No… NO HOUSE!" She started yelling and House looked down once more, ashamed of the fact that for the millionth time, he just couldn't handle the situation the proper and conventional way –even if it's not supposed to make things better in his opinion. "You don't get to make things alright. You don't get to leave me to pretend nothing happened. I don't want you to hurt so I'll probably get better and forget about it from time to time but I want you to see how much I hate you for doing the one thing I thought you would never do." She paused, seeing he would probably never look at her again, "I _can't _forgive you."

"Cuddy…" He tried, catching her arm one last time but she got scared and his grip on her became fiercer, "Let go of me." She started screaming, "Cuddy, please!" He pleaded again and he suddenly heard, "Let go of her, House!" It was Jenny and she broke them apart by slapping House's arm with her elbow, a trick her dad had taught her.

Jenny rushed Cuddy outside. The last thing Cuddy saw was House falling to the ground, his hands on his face, murmuring words she couldn't comprehend.

* * *

Peter was still parked outside when he saw a car approaching the Police Department fast. It stopped and two men got out. The old one was dragging the other one by the handcuffs, literally.

"Shit!" Peter expressed, as soon as he recognized who it was.

* * *

"Norris, our guy here is warm and ready and we have to talk." Gale said as he came to Norris with Josh.

"He knows something?" Norris asked, moving from behind his desk.

"I think he knows everything." Gale smirked.

"We've got a problem." Norris heard his daughter say as she came his way.

"What happened? Is Dr. Cuddy alright?" Norris asked.

"She's fine; she's in the waiting room with Nick and her friend Dr. Wilson." She paused, "But there is something really wrong with House. I've been prying a little on their conversation and he told her the exact same thing he told us. Sure it's his version of the truth but it's still completely insane, he can't be schizophrenic since he remembers strangling her and even his change. He's really going for the 'I wasn't in control' defense. Even a shrink couldn't get passed this."

Josh was eyeing them carefully and Norris noticed that, "You've got anything to say, kid?"

"I'm over thirty!" The man claimed.

"More like approaching forty." Gale retorted.

"You've had your mid-life crisis, let me have mine." Josh stated.

"He really is annoying!" Gale expressed.

"He's deflecting. Trying to make us think he has no idea what's going on." Jenny cut in, "Yes, Mr. Whoever you are, I've studied psychology." She added, glaring at Josh.

"I love your daughter, Norris." Gale said.

Norris rolled his eyes and asked her daughter, "You don't think it's psychological? Like he's trying to protect himself from the hurt?"

"I can't think of any case of dementia or… no anything, really." She said, folding her arms, "I'd say he's being perfectly honest and even a disease wouldn't be as persuasive."

"And we can't forget the fact that he has been kidnapped." Norris let out.

"He has what?" Gale exclaimed, "And you've waited until now to let me know that? What kind of crazy person are you?" He yelled.

"The one that doesn't yell at you!" He expressed, mocking his friend.

"Jenny, go get Nick and meet Gale and I with Mr.?" He asked Josh.

"Josh." He answered, sighing.

"We'll get your name from your complete ID anyway." Norris paused, "We'll be in the interrogation room."

Gale and Norris went with Josh to the interrogation room while Jenny walked to the waiting room.

Wilson was hugging Cuddy tightly; she hadn't been able to hold back tears. Jenny stopped herself to pick up a Kleenex from one of her colleague's desk and moved again in their direction.

"Does it hurt a lot?" Nick asked, pointing at her still bruised neck.

"A little but not as much as I thought it would." She admitted.

"Here, wipe those away. You don't want to ruin your make up." Jenny joked, handing Cuddy the tissue gently.

Cuddy appreciated the gesture and took it and started blowing her nose in it. Wilson patted her back tenderly.

"Nick?" Jenny turned to Nick who had his back resting against the wall, "As charming as it is to see you caring for another human being, I have to break that tender moment and ask you to come with me to interrogate that guy Gale brought in."

Nick rolled his eyes and said, "Why do I have to listen to you again? You're not even my boss!"

Wilson smiled at that and Cuddy was all ears, somehow listening to other people's lives was a relief.

"Because there was a point in your life when you actually had the guts to tell me in my face that you didn't have to listen to me and since we've dated and then broken up, you act differently, like you actually want to make my life easier." She paused, smiling, "And yes, it makes me happy."

"She's still into you." Wilson coughed.

Nick shook his head and said, "I'm not trying to make your life easier, I'm trying to make mine easier."

"It works both ways." Cuddy cut in.

"And how would you know that?" Nick asked.

"It used to work like that for me and House." She paused, filling up her lungs strongly and then exhaled, "None of us would admit it though." Nostalgia was a good thing because in most cases it only brings out the best memories. At least what had happened to her didn't make her that different from most people.

"You should stick around." Jenny said out of the blue, "Don't go home yet. There's a man we think is related to the case."

"What do you mean?" Cuddy asked, "House is guilty, there's nothing to look for."

"My father and his best friend think there is something more than just a simple murder attempt." She paused, not sure how to put it. Nick came to her help and said, "And we're starting to believe your boyfriend isn't completely nuts."

"I was there, he was…" She tried until another voice came in the mix.

"Lisa, honey…" Came Peter's voice.

"Peter…" She said, "I'm sorry, I completely lost track of time, are you-"She tried.

"We have to go." He said stopping in front of Nick who eyed him carefully.

"You're the one who came in with her last night?" Nick asked.

"Yes, officer." He said, "Can we go now?"

"It's Lieutenant Johnson for you, sir."He said, "You seem a little stressed… Peter, are you?" he added.

"It's doctor for you." He glared at Nick, "She just saw him, didn't she?" He paused, "Don't you think she needs some privacy now?"

"With you by her side to hold her hand?" Nick mocked the man.

"Enough! Nick!" Jenny cut in and Nick reluctantly stopped pushing it.

"I could drive you home if you want-"Wilson tried.

"It's okay, Wilson. Peter has been waiting in the car for more than an hour, I get it and I get him." She expressed.

"Okay." He said, watching her get up from her seat.

"Let's go." Peter said, taking her hand in his and they left.

"I can see why you don't like that guy." Nick remarked.

"Is it that obvious?" Wilson asked.

"Likely."He paused, "But I also really don't like him either."

"Dr. Wilson you should go home too." Jenny cut in, "It's been a long day. We'll call you as soon as we have news."

Wilson nodded and got up from his chair, "Call me if you have anything."

"We will." Jenny said.

Nick watched Wilson go and after a couple of seconds, Jenny broke his thought process, "What are you thinking about?"

"Come with me." He said, taking her hand in his.

He led her to the bathroom and closed the door behind them, "What is going on, Nick?" She asked.

"Do you trust me?"He asked.

"Right now I'm not so sure…" She replied, raising an eyebrow.

"Don't act suspicious with me; do you trust me right now or not?" He started yelling.

"Yes, I trust you, of course I trust you, I've always-"She said until two hands ended up on her neck, slightly under her jaw line. He pressed strongly on it, strangling her completely. And for about five seconds she choked, tried to free herself from his grip, kicking him anywhere she could, her eyes unable to withhold the terrified woman she was under his strength until he let go and put her into a hug.

"Shhh." He hushed in her ear as she was trying to get away from what seemed like an embrace, "What have you… why have you-" she tried to ask in between her attempts at gasping for air, "You'll be bruised." He spoke, hugging her tightly, "I took you by surprise because I wanted you not to be prepared and also because you would have never let me do it. I would never hurt you-" He tried.

He slowly let go of her as she said, getting back to her senses, "Then why did you just-"

"To prove a point, he tried not to kill her." He said, as realization had completely hit him.

"That just hurt a hell of a lot! You almost killed me!" She exclaimed, throwing a punch at him.

"Ouch, that hurts!" He screamed.

"That's for trying to squeeze the life out of me." She paused, "Now you have ten seconds to explain yourself! One." She started.

"I don't know what the reasons behind it were but he didn't try to strangle her to death." He caught his breath, "It was a chokehold!"

"What?" She asked, bewildered.

He shook his head yes and had the cutest face she had ever seen on him, he looked like a little boy who had discovered something so extraordinary he had to show it to his mother and father, "Indeed, it was a poorly applied choke, that's why it almost took up to thirty seconds..." He paused again, "He tried to render her unconscious. Why? I don't know why but her bruises where near her carotid, he's a doctor, so he obviously knew that."

"You mean… he tried to render her unconscious to delay a possible death?"

"Why not a certain death?" He expressed, "But nowhere did she say she had lost consciousness, he failed on purpose which is why it hurt her, it usually takes about three to five seconds if you know how to do it and he made it last. He had a ninety percent chance of killing her." He paused, "He didn't want her to be rendered unconscious so soon. He has been claiming he did it even though he had no intention of doing it, that he would never hurt her. Sure the bruises and the moment did hurt but… it just fits, you know."

"Whatever the reasons behind it-"She nodded, staring at him.

"He somehow tried to save her from a death by strangulation, or at least delay something he maybe had no control over. It'll be very hard to explain in front of a judge but…" He said, taking her hands in his as she sighed. He looked her in the eye, realizing that the fact that he was on such a roll wasn't so appropriate in a moment like this, "Are you okay?"

"Did you really have to go this far as hurting me for real?" She smiled slightly.

"I know this case is important to you because it's important for your father, you know I don't do well with expressing things myself." He paused, "I guess me figuring this out is a contribution I wanted to give you and you know how far I have to go sometimes."

"You could have used someone else's neck!" She said, hitting him in the chest.

"I knew you wouldn't sue me, besides chokeholds are allowed in martial arts." He smiled at her, taking her in his arms once more.

"Who says I won't sue you?" She said, resting her head against his shoulder blade.

"He withheld himself." He paused.

"He did." She acknowledged, "And he doesn't even know it."

"I know it." He said, putting a finger under her chin to tilt her head back a little, "Thanks to you and your complete trust in me." He ran his other hand through her hair.

"I knew he was too much in love with her to just not try to fight back."She said, happier now.

"Or he's just an even worse sociopath than we think he is." He expressed, seriously.

"True." And there she was just as serious; however it didn't prevent her from using that moment he had purposely built up between them, "But sometimes you've got to just play the game." She said, bringing her mouth to his. While they kissed, he brought his hands to her neck and she suddenly felt the pain again, "Ouch!" She uttered.

"Sorry." He said.

"Gosh! It must hurt her even a lot worse since your squeezing only lasted for about five seconds…" She expressed as he massaged her neck, their nose still touching, "Feels good?" He asked.

"That feels so good, thank you." She moaned again and so leading her lips one more time to his, "I've missed this." She said, in between kisses.

"Remind me never to try BDSM with you again!" He joked.

She pulled back and slapped him right where she had punched him previously, "Ouch!" His scream echoed in the bathroom again.

"That was for ruining the moment!" She said, trying to compose herself, "Seriously? Strangling me? What the hell is wrong with you? Of all the guys I've fell in love with; you are the worst when it comes to brilliant ideas! God why have you forsaken me?" She said, staring at the ceiling.

"Not my fault if you can take mostly everything! You're a beast, but you're mine!" He expressed.

"You really do sound like House, you know that?" She frowned.

"Speaking of which, we should go meet your dad." He scratched his head, "Don't worry, you're revenge is only one minute away."

She abruptly took her hand in his and led him out of the bathroom she said, "Yeah, I'm going to go cry to daddy."

* * *

"So, Josh."Gale started, "Is Dr. House a murderer?"

"Who the hell are you talking about?" Josh asked.

"We've asked Brandon to get your ID." Norris said.

"We're fairly certain we know who you are." Gale let out, arms folded against his chest.

"He should text us within the next five minutes." Norris added.

"Detective Norris here will then very happy to conduct this interview… or should I say-"Gale tried.

"No, don't say it. You're going to scare the poor boy." Norris said.

"Oh come on just about the… you know and the…" He expressed, moving his head for each unspoken details in the process.

"No really…Really?" Norris kept playing.

"No…you're right, we shouldn't." He remarked, shaking his head.

"Okay! Will you guys stop it?" Josh yelled.

"Are you going to talk then?" Gale glared.

"What do you want me to say?" Josh protested.

"You can start with the beginning." Norris explained.

"The guy didn't even really read me my rights, what are the charges against me, huh? I have a right to talk to my lawyer first." Josh claimed.

"Oh shut it!"Gale let out.

Norris' cell started vibrating, indicating a message had been sent to him, "Brandon really is the fastest on the market!" He opened the text message and read it.

"That smile on your face leaves me to believe you were right about that thought you had as soon as you heard his name, am I right?" Gale smirked.

"Yep." Norris smirked back.

"This is getting good!" Gale nodded, still smirking.

"What the hell is going on?!" Josh let out, "I don't even have a freaking clue who that Dr. House is!"

"You're name is Harvey. Josh Harvey. I'm sorry to have to be the one giving you this glorious news." Gale expressed, "You're the worst liar and an incredibly big idiot."

"You're the one who called 911 that night. Allegedly, you were just a witness and you left the crime scene before the police arrived." Norris explained, "I didn't really think it was suspicious at first, I thought you were from the neighborhood."

"Then in the course of my own investigation where I ended up at Dr. Cuddy's house, I saw you with your best friend Peter, thanks to your confirmation and saw him give you that beautiful piece of a suitcase filled with lots and when I say lots, I mean a crazy amount of cash. I followed you and now here we are." Gale added.

"And all that just because of the Lucky Strike!" Norris claimed.

"It makes you want to start smoking, doesn't it?"Gale said.

"More like quitting, I have to admit." Norris retorted.

"You guys figured all that from a pack of Luckys?" Josh cut in.

"Figured what out, Mr. Harvey?"Norris said, "You are the one who's going to help us get to the bottom of this. You might even get a deal out of this."

"Either you tell us and we make sure you don't spend as much time in prison as the man behind the bars or the man who gave you the money so that you'd leave town or whatever bullshit he came up with, depending on your answers and I really do hope you'll give us the right ones."

Josh thought about it for a second, they were on the right track and he knew it, "Where do I start?"

"Have you ever heard of the Cole-Stevenson case Mr. Harvey?" Norris asked.

"Mr. Cole's wife was having an affair with another man, Mr. Stevenson. He found out and tried to stop it but the love he had for his wife wasn't reciprocated. She was in love with Mr. Stevenson. Since Dave Cole was-"He tried.

"Dave… that's the name House remembered… one of his kidnappers I think." Norris said.

"Keep going, we're making progress." Gale said.

"Dave Cole was a psychiatrist and he used drugs on his wife that he had been experimenting on with his colleagues that facilitated hypnosis. It has been said that he made his wife kill her lover before he shot himself in the head. But it's always been debatable. The police thought the wife couldn't actually take it anymore –her husband's abusive love and decided to strangle her lover in his sleep because she couldn't love him freely. A weird crime of passion that never really made any sense, especially with the cigarettes that were left on the table by the bed."

"What were those cigarettes and to whom did they belong?" Gale asked.

"They were Lucky Strike and they belonged to Mr. Dave Cole. However traces of Tobacco were found on Mrs. Cole even though she didn't smoke, which means she had been smoking that night. And that was unusual since the smell itself was enough to make her vomit." He paused.

"And then what, Mr. Harvey?"

"Within the next five days after the murder, she was addicted to Lucky Strike. She never stopped smoking them after that. If I recall correctly she has been in a psych ward for almost twenty years now."

"See Mr. Harvey, it seems to me that you have re-created that crime of passion twenty years later. I'd like to know why." Norris asked.

"Dr. House had no drugs in his system contrary to Mrs. Cole. The only thing that seemed kinky enough to make us believe he is innocent is the Lucky Strike pack of cigarette he only smoked between the time he was abducted and the moment he tried to kill Dr. Cuddy."

"You've seen him give me the money so I assume you believe he's my partner in crime, right?" Josh let out.

Both men nodded, "Well you're wrong he's the one behind it all. I've been his friend for about twenty years. He made me fabricate the EBXF-" He tried.

"The what?" Gale asked, as much intrigued as he hated feeling completely stupid.

"Electronic Bypass Exhilarating Frequency, it's what we've implanted in Dr. House's head. Don't do an MRI because you'll kill him. It's been de-activated the moment Peter tasered him anyway. A CT scan will show it to you though."

Josh saw the looks on both men's faces and knew he would have to explain, "Peter wants Lisa for himself, except Lisa has always been in love with Dr. House, he hated that and all these years when Peter was cheating on his girlfriends and testing his love for them he was preparing for this day when he would find the perfect girl, the love of his life and enjoy destroying anything that would come in his way." He paused, "The guy is insane but I've been enabling him for years by building that piece of technology. He told me about the Cole-Stevenson but he wanted me to make it more modern and of course a success. The point was to have no death this time even though there was a 99% chance he'd kill her which is why Peter and I were close by, ready to taser him. I was in the car, checking his brain activity and I have to say I really don't know how he managed not to kill her within the first two seconds."

"And what about the Lucky Strike thing?" Norris asked.

"You can call it a trade mark and it also helps with the EBXF's impulses." He paused, "That thing is my baby and I had no idea it would go this far at first. I thought he was joking fifteen years ago and even later, I mean two months ago I still had no idea he was still clung to the idea of making the whole thing happen."

"So you've abducted Dr. House?" Gale asked.

"We have, he had been analyzing House from the beginning and knew all the things he wanted him to see and think of in order to have him attack Dr. Cuddy. I implanted the EBXF with him and a surgeon he got from God knows where, some Japanese butcher. He then had fun with Patient X as I decided to call him." He sighed.

"House?"Norris asked.

"Yes." Josh nodded.

"Now, I'm wondering, was it another quirk of his to use the name Dave? Why this fascination with the Cole-Stevenson case? It's practically a cold case only old cops like us would be interested in…" Gale explained.

"He considers his mother like a whore… don't you get it? You've figured this all mess out and you can't even figure that one out? Don't you remember me telling you about the psychological events in his life when we were at the video store?" He paused, Gale was a little lost with all the information he had been processing, "I told you his dad had developed an addiction to cigarettes and that he ended up-"

"Shooting himself in the head." Norris said before Gale could.

"Like father like son." Gale nodded, "Call Brandon, now!" He ordered.

Norris didn't waste anymore time and dialed Brandon, "Hey, it's Norris, I'm putting Gale through."

Norris handed Gale the phone, "Hey Brandon… yeah, I'll go downstairs for a drink later… but I need your help first. Give me the name of that Peter guy that came in for the deposition yesterday… "They waited a couple of seconds, hearing Gale utter a few, "hm…yeah…okay." Before he hung up.

"I can't believe we've missed this, his name is indeed Cole, Peter Cole! He's Dr. Dave Cole's son." Gale let out, furious, "And we didn't mention the Cole-Stevenson case to House, or Dr. Cuddy or even Dr. Wilson, which is why we couldn't put it together. They all know his last name for Christ's sake!"

"You know, none of this changes the fact that House definitely did it. I mean he was in control of his actions and even a small piece of electronics like mine –hell, especially a deactivated one that can't be restarted, won't get him off the hook."

"He's right…" Norris sighed.

"No, Norris, we don't give up!" He said and then turned to face Josh again, a fierce look in his eyes, "And you, I'll have you know that I'll do everything in my power to prove to that damn jury he's going to be faced with that he didn't kill the woman he loves!"

"Dad!" Jenny suddenly barged in the room with Nick right behind her, "He tried _not_ to kill her."

Norris watched his daughter try to catch her breath and noticed something unusual, "Why are you wearing a scarf inside the building?"

"What do you mean?" Gale cut in; ready to save the jerky doctor at all costs now.

Nick saw his end coming within ten feet away, "Nick and I are back together, he says he wants to have my babies and all and so you know I got all excited and a few hickeys ensued." She grabbed Nick's hand and squeezed him, he sighed in relief. Norris got a huge grin on his face.

"That's fantastic but please can we focus on the case again?" Gale asked, quite stressed.

"And, it's Nick who figured it all out!" She smiled proudly.

Nick who had been swallowing his breath for the last minute was finally able to explain himself properly, "I've taken a closer look at Dr. Cuddy's bruises earlier and I've noticed they were marking the carotid heavily. I'm a hundred percent sure that he was trying to prevent himself from strangling her and tried to chokehold her to unconsciousness."

"That's my man!" Jenny smirked, giving him a peck on the cheek.

Gale sighed with relief, "We have to go talk to Dr. Cuddy now." He said, rushing outside.

"Gale, she has gone home already." Nick explained.

"What?!" Norris cut in, "When did she leave?"

"About fifteen minutes ago with her friend Peter. Apparently he had been waiting for her in his car for over an hour already." She said.

"Oh my God!" Gale let out, putting a hand against his forehead, "What if he has seen me coming in with Josh?"

"We have got to go, Gale!" Norris yelled.

"Wait a minute, do you think he is capable of hurting her?" Gale asked Josh, trying as much as he could to calm himself down before doing anything stupid.

"Honestly? I don't know." Josh admitted.

"What is going on?" Nick asked.

"He's the real bastard in this story. We've had the confirmation, it's too long to explain but it's him. House is innocent." Norris explained.

"I knew that Peter guy was trouble!" Nick couldn't contain himself anymore and headed out in haste.

"Wait, Nick! Where are you going?" Jenny asked, concerned as she followed after him.

"I'm gonna go get House!" He exclaimed.

* * *

Hope you've liked it or that you think it's not too bad, so let me know! Also, the rest of the fic will definitely be more about the actual House/Cuddy relationship because you always need repercussions. ;)


	10. Devotion

Sorry for taking such a long time to update, life's been pretty busy and I also made a vid, lol. It's called Sex On Fire on youtube, of course it's House/Cuddy if you want to check it out. ;)

So this chapter is sort of intriguing by the end, I guess and I promise you, you'll get the rest of this part of the story: probably tomorrow if you hit that review button a lot. ;) I hope you like it, it's again un-beta'ed, so I'm sorry for all the mistakes and/or typos. Still, enjoy!!

* * *

**Chapter 10: ****Devotion.**

"You can't do that!" Jenny shouted as she ran after Nick.

She, Norris and Gale had been following him to House's cell.

"Open the cell!" Nick yelled at the guard. The guard rushed himself and did as he had been ordered to.

House had overheard rapid steps coming his way but nothing would have made him move at that moment, nothing but the voice of someone's voice he would probably never hear until her testimony and his hearing in front of a jury, and then not for a long time and very likely, never again.

"You're a free man, House!" Nick expressed, trying to get House's attention but as he was bulging with reasoning that went beyond achievable things, he didn't even turn his head.

"Hey? You hear me!" Nick repeated, "You're free, House! We're getting you out and the charges should be dropped as soon as we get our hands on him."

House still hadn't moved, too lost in the thoughts that made him just not want to get out. Because, it simply wasn't worth getting out as she would never want to see him again.

The guard stepped back as soon as he had unlocked the cell's door, "House…" Jenny cut in, "Nick is only…I mean, she needs to know the truth!"

"What truth?" House finally spoke, anger rising in his tone as he got up, "What's the point in being free when you can't even talk to the woman that is your boss, that you've tried to kill and… wait, that makes your fucking life matters only now she has no desire to see the damn face of a killer!"

"Except you didn't try to kill her House! He did and we have to get going NOW!" Nick cut in again, louder this time. The man was desperate in trying to explain himself.

"What?" House asked, moving closer to the bars of the cell, the door still wasn't open, "How come… who…" he tried, concerned fierce in his stare. Jenny gulped once or twice, she couldn't remember before Nick answered, "He did! Peter Cole! He and his friend implanted something at the back of your head, we still need the people at –why not, your hospital to do one of that thingy T confirm…"

"CT."Norris cut in.

"Yeah! But it's enough, Josh Harvey's confession is enough but we have to get going now, House!" Nick kept pushing.

House just stared at him, completely frozen, the boiling anger inside of him clouding his thought process for the first time in too long for his liking.

"Why do we need him again, exactly?" Jenny asked, not sure why Nick was so eager to have House come with them for the arrest.

House's adrenalines, at the words uttered before him made him close his fists.

"Because he wants to give House a chance to confront the man who put him through hell." Norris sighed, understanding Nick's desire.

The only thing House could think of –and his bloodshot eyes were the main indicator, was to kill Peter Cole with his bare hands, "He's Dave…" he murmured to himself.

"It makes misery not easy at first but then it still makes it easier to deal with." Gale cut in.

Jenny nodded and looked at the man she admired once again, "What's your plan?"

Nick looked at her but had to keep talking to a very dangerous House now and so had to ignore her but not her question, "House, we need you to stay in control of your emotions, we need his confession because, trust me on this, it will make this whole affair easier to take care of and we'll explain everything to Dr. Cuddy, your friends, your family but we need you right now, in complete control." He paused, "Do I have your complete attention, House."

House looked at him, his brows so furrowed and his teeth so gritted, even a gangster would have feared for his life, "Yes." He practically groaned. Norris, Gale nodded at the same time, giving Nick the signal that he was being given complete control of the situation.

"Okay, here's what we're going to do." Nick said, finally opening the door, urging House and everybody else out.

* * *

Back at her house, Cuddy sat on the couch. She had been shivering all the way back, maybe it was from the fact that Peter had been quite tense, maybe it was because she couldn't help but still think about House or maybe it was just the cold air outside. She probably just didn't want to think about why she felt so weak.

"You mind if I smoke inside?" He didn't really ask as he sat on the couch next to her, his knees trembling slightly.

Taken aback, Cuddy simply nodded but added, "But in fact I do mind a little since House started smoking as well and it's just reminding me so much and I can't…the smell is bothering me. So yeah I can deal with it but I don't like it." She tried, getting up from the couch.

"I don't give a fuck about what House started doing, whether it was cigarettes or you!" He suddenly yelled, grabbing her arm to put her back on the couch, "You see, I'm going through a lot of things as well here, I'm trying to get you better, I'm trying to help you through this and you can't seem to be able to stop thinking about him!"

He let go of her hand as he saw that he might have just gone a little too far here, "I'm sorry." He said, "You don't need that."

"No, you're right." She said, grabbing her own fist to massage it, his hold on her had been quite fierce, "You're being good to me and I'm just… I don't know."

"I think we should go on a little trip for a while, just the two of us."He expressed, taking a puff, "What about somewhere warm, were we'll get to stop thinking about what happened." He grabbed her hand in his, caressing the back of hers with his thumb.

"I've been thinking about it, actually. I'm already taking time off work, obviously." She tried, "But I think I should go alone."

"What?"He let out just a little too loud again.

"I don't think I'm ready for us to be together, to be us again."She said.

"I won't ask you for anything until you're ready." He said with a smile, "But I think I should go with you, I don't want you to be alone. I care about you too much and if anything happened to you again, I don't know what I… I would never forgive myself." He paused, "I'll just stay in another room, I won't bother you, and I'll just keep an eye on you."

She sighed and nodded, "Okay."

"What about we leave tomorrow… hell, why not even tonight? I hear the Barbados is nice this time of the year… or isn't it all year long?" He raised an eyebrow, smiling.

"Are you serious?" She asked, "Why the rush? I mean, I have to pack my things and…"

"The sooner we go, the sooner you'll get better and the sooner we'll get better." He let out.

"But with the investigation going on, aren't we supposed to stay in the state for the next few weeks?" She asked, positive they shouldn't leave this soon.

"I'll call the police and ask them." He assured her.

"Okay." She said.

And behind that fake smile of his, behind his lie and never mind the fact that he wouldn't call the police anyway, he never felt bad about anything because everything had its reason: his devotion to the woman he couldn't wait to bed again. If this isn't love, he didn't know what it was.

* * *

On the way to Lisa Cuddy's house, the van was about to park in front of it while police cars waited at the corner of the road for the signal that would tell them to move.

"You know you're a genius, right?" Jenny said to Nick who, were respectively in the passenger and driver's seat.

He turned to her and kissed her softly on the lips. She uttered a small cry as he had touched her neck in the process, "Sorry." He apologized.

"It's fine, it's just a little sore." She smiled at him, "You're still a genius though and… a great kisser."

"I just hope she's going to be able to forgive him like you were able to forgive me."

"It will probably take her more time but…" She sighed, "It wasn't him."

"It was him, she will never be able to look pass that fact again." He closed his eyes.

"It will be a different him but she's in love with him and if she's willing to give him another chance, she can come to terms with the fact that he only wanted what was best for her even under the influence of something that only mathematics should have been able to break." Jenny explained.

"Human emotions are way more exciting than computers anyway." He winked at her.

"You're thinking about your plan again, don't you have a heart?" Jenny rolled her eyes at him.

"It was my way of saying that yes my plan is awesome but also that this story doesn't have to end badly, it will just take time." He explained, smiling at her.

"Not that I don't think you two lovebirds aren't sweet with your love theories but we have to arrest a psycho and House is getting very impatient at the back." Gale expressed.

"You've heard everything?" Jenny asked Gale, "Did dad…?" She tried.

"No, I'm the only one who heard this." Gale nodded, "You've played with fire here, kid." He told Nick, the latter realizing the old man had figured the chokehold test part.

"I'll tell Norris after we're done here." Nick paused, "And then when I'll be dying, will you tell Jenny she's the woman of my life?"

Jenny went to hug Nick tightly, "I'll make sure he doesn't go too hard on you." Gale rolled his eyes and went back to the back of the van, "Now, let's get going."

Nick picked up his walkie-talkie and said, "All units, this is Johnson, Operation Payback starts now, Swat Teams undercover are you ready?"

"Ready."

"Ready." He heard both teams' leader say.

"Boss, is House ready?"

"He is." Norris answered and opened the back of the van.

* * *

Inside the house, most lights were off. Peter and Lisa were on their way out to the airport when Peter paused in front of the door, "Before we go, there is one thing I need you to tell me."

"What is it?" She asked.

"Do you know why House started smoking?" He asked, positioning his hand on the front door's knob.

"No." She let out a sight, "Just like I don't know why you've never told me you used to smoke before you started dating me."

"Does it bother you?" He asked.

"I just don't see how this is relevant now." She asked.

He let go of the doorknob, and turned around to face her, "It's relevant to me." He uttered through gritted teeth, "I want to know why you didn't seem to mind the fact that he had been smoking the other night but that you just plainly do hate it that I smoke myself. Is the taste in my mouth so awful you can't even begin to think about adding the smell of cigarettes to it, huh?" He kept pushing, moving in her direction.

"Peter, I think you're over-reacting to my comment on this from earlier." She expressed, moving backwards.

"Will I ever be better than him?" He kept going.

"What the hell is wrong with you?" She asked, hitting the wall behind her.

"Will you ever stop thinking of him as a sex God whose taste of everything, even cigarette doesn't bother you?" He expressed, his eyes making her fear the worst.

"I understand you're jealous…" She tried.

"I'm not jealous of him fucking you better than I ever could, I'm jealous of the fact that you don't seem to mind that this man tried to kill you… because I have to go through this then, I do mind that he put his hands on you, I care about you and you just don't give a fuck. So yeah, I'm jealous that I actually do feel something about it. You, you're just numb."

"What are you talking about? You're not making any sense."

"I'm doing it all for you and you still look at me like I'm nothing." He yelled at her.

"Stop it!" She tried to get away from him but he grabbed a good hold on her, backing her up against the wall.

"You're just a filthy whore, you're the kind that enjoys brutal stuff, you like it hard because it makes it even more worth it, you get off from men that don't mind beating you up mentally and now physically." He paused, his mouth inches from hers, "What do I have to do to make you understand you mean everything to me, no matter what you are or what you thrive on, huh?"

"Please, don't…" She let out, too frightened to cry.

He shook his head and surprisingly chuckled harshly as if taken aback, "No, how can you believe I would rape you?" He put his thumb on her bottom lip and applied pressure on it, "Don't you understand? I'll do anything you want me to do; I'll even let you beat the crap out of me or beat the crap out of you if that's what you want because if that's him you want, I'll be him."

"I don't want you to be him." She said, "I just need to figure out an escape route."

"I want to be, I need to be your escape route." He said while Cuddy was really trying to figure out an escape route that very moment, that guy was a nut job.

She couldn't have believed her luck when a man broke the front window and came inside, she hoped it was the police, she wanted it to be so simple but she had no idea her savior would be the one man she thought was in jail, the one who had tried to kill her.

* * *

_A few hours later, somewhere dark, a fra__gment of his imagination maybe, his surroundings were extremely familiar, it was his basement. A man was seated in front of him, he couldn't see his face but his first words to him told him it was the end._

Peter Cole

Record 1, March 26th

_Do you know where you are?_

Should I?

_Why did you shoot him in the chest, why not the head where you had decided to put an effective end to life as he knew it?_

Because he is a danger to humanity and she tried to save him, that bitch.

_She held onto your arm, trying to prevent you from killing him. You were already in trouble Mr. Cole, now you're just going to end up where you wanted him to be._

I don't care, now that he's dead.

_I will come back later; you have a lot of explaining to do. Although, it is clear you're insane._

Is this why you brought me here? To make me endure what I've made him go through and help me make some sense out of my actions? Josh and I did an amazing work together and it started here, maybe it didn't turn out the way I wanted it to be but at least she's going to be just as miserable as I'll be and that, for the rest of her life. She should join my mother's psych ward. You can't make me suffer, whoever you are, I won this. I won it all, I destroyed what made me insane and now I'm happy. So again, if this is why you've brought me here, you're fucked because to everybody else, I'm insane, no matter what.

_Thank you for your confession, Mr. Cole. I'm sure Dr. House will be thrilled to know you're going to stay the same insane man you've always been._

End of Record.


	11. Destination

Sorry guys for taking so long to update but I have my finals soon and life has been pretty busy. I'm going to try to keep updating this story as fast as I can but just so you know even if it takes me more than a week to update, this story isn't over and it will have a proper ending because I don't write just to write stuff I won't finish. I have every intention to finish this story. :)

This one again is probably full of errors, grammar, syntax, typos or w/e but I can't be arsed to get a beta now and I'm pretty sure you guys are used to my mistakes by now, lol. However for all my mistakes, I'm sorry. Otherwise, **I hope you enjoy this chapter **(hopefully my chapters are long enough for you to survive the time in between my uploads) and last but not least, **don't forget to review and tell me what you think!!**

* * *

**Chapter 11: Destination.**

An absent minded Nick went to his front door and opened it. "Hey." He heard her say, "I brought you… actually I've brought you nothing but myself." She smiled and he smiled back at her.

"I thought you would still be at the station but Dad said he wanted your report by tomorrow." She said, trying not to look at the huge bruise the young man had on his left cheek, he tried to look away and she noticed her own staring, "Sorry, I just can't help it… I'm sorry."

"Your Dad surely doesn't want you here right now, you know that, right?" He said, scratching his head.

"Of course but he knows I'll be here anyway." She smiled at him, "And I want to spend tonight with you." She admitted, biting her bottom lip.

He sighed and let her in, "Come in."

She followed after him inside and hugged him from behind, inhaling his scent, "You stink, why don't you and I go grab a quick shower?"

He patted her arm and chuckled, "Thanks, but if you're going to stay with me tonight, you're going to have to stop trying to use your charms on me. I love you but I really have to finish that report or I won't be able to ask your dad for your hand."

She closed her eyes and rested her head against his back and agreed with a sigh, "I'm going to lie down on your bed; pretend I'm asleep while I'll in fact be waiting for you… naked and horny." She let go of her hold on him and walked passed him.

With his cheeky grin he called after her, shaking his head in disbelief, "I'll come and ravage you when I'm done with this."

"The case is over, Nick. You and I deserve our happy time just like they're both going to get theirs."

"You know it's never really over and you're only saying this because you know that I actually somewhere deep inside me feel for them and that I really hope they work it out." He sighed.

"I know of your not so secret romantic nature." She smiled at him, "But I know they'll work it out, besides Dad has Cole's confession, thanks to you, my hero!"

"But I need to remember what happened to the anti-hero tonight." He explained.

"Why does it matter so much to you in the end?" She asked.

"Because this report isn't just going to be for Norris, or Gale or the judge they might end up seeing in court if they decide to testify. I want it to be for her. She deserves to know how much this man loves her." He paused, "What he did to her, I even did it to you in the end for Christ's sake and look at us! You…" his voice trailed off.

"We're good together." She smiled at him, understanding perfectly, "You want to give her more than just the statement of a police officer."

"Just like that man would never just give you a diagnosis." He said and she nodded.

"I love you." She said and went to his bedroom. "I love you too." He said, moving to his kitchen where his laptop was. He sat down on his chair and placed his fingers above the keyboard. He started typing, back in the action with a look back that would mean everything to their story.

_-__Earlier that night._

"_I don't want you to be him." She said, "I just need to figure out an escape route."_

"_I want to be, I need to be your escape route." He said while Cuddy was really trying to figure out an escape route that very moment, that guy was a nut job. _

_She couldn't have believed her luck when a man broke the front window and came inside, she hoped it was the police, she wanted it to be so simple but she had no idea her savior would be the one man she thought was in jail, the one who had tried to kill her. _

Panic rushed through her as he came inside the room with small difficulty and definitely no cane in hand, "Let go of her." He asked, calmly.

"House…" Her voice broke.

"How did you fucking get out?!" Peter let out, letting her go so fast she fell to the floor.

"I am powerful enough now, thanks to you, Peter." He explained.

"What?"Cuddy tried, getting up on her feet, "What is he talking about?"

Peter thought about it for a second and said nothing, Cuddy panicked some more and said, "We should call the police."

"I don't have a fucking clue so shut up!" He started pacing around and stopped the moment he saw House moving slowly in their direction, "Oh, we have got to get out of here." He let out, feeling stupid now.

"No kidding!" Cuddy rolled her eyes at him and looked at House again, she was fairly certain she had seen a smirk on his face for about half a second.

"I'm not here to harm you." He said, looking straight ahead of him. Neither cuddy nor Peter knew whom he was aiming at that very moment.

But he kept moving and Cuddy didn't feel reassured to say the least, her back against the wall, she was now trapped between a still pacing and thoughtful Peter and the only man that couldn't possibly get her out of this mess; because you can't trust the one person you finally know so much about.

"What do you want then?" Pete stopped pacing and eyed him carefully.

"I want you to tell her the truth." House said.

"I don't know what you're talking about." Pete explained and moved directly in front of Cuddy, "Don't you dare move any closer."

"I'll get to her no matter what, I won't think twice about making you… let's say: step aside." House expressed adamant.

"What the hell is going on?" Cuddy let out, "What truth?" She got leery of everything, Pete was frozen and since there wasn't anyone she could turn to, she took a chance at him, "House?" – Or more like a risk.

"Your ex calls me Patient X." House let out, smirking at the fact that this little statement had rhymed while moving even closer, a couple of feet away from them now.

"You shut up and stay away, now!" Peter yelled, getting a Colt 45 from behind his waistband in no time, under his jacket. He grabbed a firm hold on Cuddy and whispered to her hear, "Trust me." and pointed the gun at her. House stopped dead on his tracks and seeing the look of horror on Cuddy's face, he wasn't sure whatever move Peter was about to pull would go in his favor. Things just never really go as planned.

"I'll kill her before you get to her." Peter let out, "It'll go faster this way, and you can't control yourself anyway."

"I'm in control." House explained, "Which is something you can't seem to be able to pull off, jackass."

House was playing with fire and Cuddy shot him a furious look. This was the man she knew, she couldn't put all the pieces together but she figured the man in front of her had no intention of doing her any harm, compared to the one who had actually asked her to trust her with a loaded gun pressed against her temple. House couldn't believe it but she had just given her the bossy glare she only had for him as she had mouthed his name. Sweat had form on his own temples and he was starting to fear the worse.

"So you think I'm about to kill her without having the intention of killing her? It's a little bit redundant, don't you think?" Peter mocked House and even though overwhelmed by her own fear, Cuddy realized that comment about her had nothing to do about her. This wasn't about her, it was between them.

"Did I ever use a gun?" House asked. Peter breathed in and breathed out as he looked down and instantly let his arm relax and hang out, "Failed calculations." House pushed it and suddenly saw Peter rise his arm one more time to point his Colt –only this time not at Cuddy but at him. "What if I put Patient X to rest then? The world needs more pretty women like her than failed experiments." Peter groaned through gritted teeth, "The tragic story of a man who tried to redeem himself even though it was never, ever his fault." He mocked. Cuddy's eyes went straight to House's. House let out a sigh and closed never breaking eye contact with the woman Peter had a firm hold on her said, "And don't you think killing me will have its effect on her as well?" Even Cuddy didn't know the answer to that, she hadn't thought about it that way, she thought she was going to die a minute ago. She wanted to live but once her survival had to do with the man who had hurt her to the point where all she wanted was for him to suffer, she didn't know if she would be strong enough to be aware of his suffering.

Memories of their last encounter echoed,

"_It takes a lot of will to stay alive knowing what I've done."_

"_The only reason it's still beating is because I need you to forgive me." _He had no desire to live but he would.

"_I can't forgive you." _She had ended the conversation with words that would put his legendary misery above all miseries. It was her punishment for him.

"Well you better choose your answer right, baby."

"Do you want that man to die for what he did to you?"

She said nothing.

"Answer the question, baby; it's alright." Peter kept pushing it.

"He won't kill you. No matter what, he needs you." House expressed, never leaving her eyes.

"I can't-"

"Answer the fucking question now!" Peter got increasingly mad in no time.

"I don't-"She tried.

"Answer the damn question, Cuddy!" House yelled.

"I don't know if I need you to live" Cuddy yelled, never looking away from his blue eyes but eventually calmed down and added, "but by saying that I don't, I'm not… I'm not ready… I don't forgive you."

"And what is that feminine talk supposed to answer for?" Peter got impatient, "How will you feel if I pull the trigger and put him down?" He said, talking of House as of an animal.

"He will have won." Cuddy let out and House's eyes went wide, those four words meant the world to him, she would always be willing to forgive him, "Don't shoot him." She said and House knew he had now fifty percent chance of dying because Cuddy can't always take over the mind of a mad man – unless it's him.

Peter eyed her carefully and nodded, letting his arm hang out once more, "Sorry Lisa…" he licked his lips, "but he loses." In a heart beat he let go of his grip on her, aimed his gun back at House's head and pulled the trigger faster than he had anticipated as her hands had managed to grip his thrust out arm in order to make it aim everywhere but at House. The sound of the gunshot echoed in her brain as well as the sound of a body falling to the ground just as loudly. She hadn't been able to prevent it; House had taken the shot, "No." She screamed rushing to his inert body and crashed beside him.

Pete stood there fearless and said, "He died two minutes ago because of your hesitation." All her medical training was on the verge of disappearing as she saw him there, eyes closed. She rested the palm of her hand against his cheek and brought her lips to his ear, "HOUSE!" She yelled, "I'm sorry, I'm so sorry." She started crying thinking this was the end, "House, don't… not, just don't die, I'll never forgive you just… don't die on me like that, House, please…" Her voice trailed off as she got her grip back and put her lips to his in order to apply CPR on him, while working on his shirt at the same time to get a better look at the wound itself.

"Right, so now you're trying to save him. Forget it, I got him in the heart, he's dead, you whore." Peter exclaimed, pacing around the living room to pick up his stuff. Cuddy was about to move her head away from House's to get a better look at the wound. What she felt under the palm of her hands was harder than House's torso, how many piece of clothing did he have under that shirt? In no time, she felt his lips move under hers and something grabbed her hand –the one that had been working on his shirt. His eyes were still closed but she felt and heard, "Don't move."

Suddenly, one, two, three other windows broke, glass shattering and the breaking of the front door ensued. Men who looked like they were out from a science fiction movie, wearing some sort of military black design that wasn't military were on their way inside, "Who the fuck are you?" Peter had time to say before three men circled him. The Submachine gun that were aimed straight him, forced him to not make a choice between peeing in his pants while freezing from fear of death –or arrest, or getting his gun back and go straight to hell.

"Step away from the man." One man commanded Cuddy and took House's pulse, "He's dead." The man nodded to who Cuddy thought was the man's superior officer of some sort.

"Get him." The superior commanded and the men circling Peter did as they were told, put a blindfold on Peter's head and rushed him out of the house in no time. "In the van, now!" The man kept hurrying his team.

"Is there anybody else here?" The other man asked Cuddy. She nodded her head no and he took off his mask the minute he heard the van drive off.

Cuddy frowned and tried, "Who are-"

The man sighed and started yelling in the direction of House, "ARE YOU FUCKING INSANE?!" House who had remained eyes closed the whole time, finally opened them and looked at Norris as he tried to sit up, "WHEN WE GAVE YOU THE SAFE WORD HOUSE IT WAS FOR YOU TO USE IT, DAMNIT! YOU ARE NO SUPERMAN!"

House rolled his eyes and said, "Nope, my name's House, Greg House!" He joked and Cuddy just stood there completely stunned, "Right, don't you recognize him?" he asked her.

She looked back at Norris and he said, "Sorry, I'm Detective Norris and yes I was the one assigned on your case. You must have a lot of questions."

A bewildered Cuddy looked back in anger at House and he answered her questions for her, "As you can see, I was wearing a bulletproof vest." He paused and she shook her head, closing her eyes in the process, "And thanks for the CPR." He smirked with that boyish grin of his.

The House that was in front of her was indubitably different from the one she had seen behind bars only a couple hours ago and she couldn't help but wonder about all sorts of things now. What was going on? That was her question.

"Johnson is taking him with the team to his basement and then if he confesses, he'll take him back to the station." Norris scratched his head, "We need you to come back to the station with us though. The two of you." He added, giving House a cane.

_-End of report on Operation Payback._

Nick saved his file and shut down his laptop. He was done typing for the night. He walked to his bedroom and took off his shirt halfway into the room before hitting the bed. He crawled into it and went to hug Jenny from behind, "Are you done?" She asked.

"Yep. I went over the Operation and the confession I got from Cole." He said inhaling her scent.

"Good." She smiled.

"Good night, Jenny." He said.

"Come on! I'm naked and all, can't I-"She tried even though she was just as sleepy as he was.

He shrugged, "I'm not interested in sleeping with you unless you tell me what else happened."

* * *


	12. Deactivation

Heya all! I know this one is long overdue but I had my finals and so many other things going on that I couldn't keep up with the update(s). I didn't want to make this story longer than it already is so I figured I'd just try to write a small but meaningful ending. I hope you like it. I promise to write more soon, I have new ideas so stay tuned for maybe a new story!

* * *

**Chapter 12: ****Deactivation**

Sometime around midnight, Lisa Cuddy found herself mourning no loss. Lisa Cuddy had been taught everything was a cheat. She wasn't the only victim in this insane story. The man who had tried to kill her was the other victim because he never, in fact, intended to kill her. He tried to save her and save himself in the process. She felt cheated, it was the most horrible feeling she had ever experienced. She had been every step of the way. As her brain had finished processing every information Norris and Gale had managed to gather in short sentences, she walked out the police station. House watched her, registering her action instantly, he followed after her.

Each step getting faster and faster every stairs she put foot on, she didn't realize the rain tumbling down would unease her gait. She fell on her back and it hurt like hell. But the hurt was not just another reason for her to cry, it was just how it was supposed to build up to it.

"Cuddy!"House yelled as he watched her coat getting more wet, "Are you okay?"

House heard nothing more than the rain; he scratched his neck and walked to her slowly. Cuddy didn't dare to look at him as he sat down next to her. "Cuddy…" he sighed as he tentatively put his hand on her shoulder. The gentleness of his touch took Cuddy aback, she was torn between getting away from him and just trusting what seemed like the most appeasing feeling she had experienced in days.

"That's good; at least you're not pushing me away." He had noticed.

Cuddy closed her eyes and after taking a big breath nodded in the direction of the pavement, "I fell", she said weakly.

House watched her instead of saying anything that would compromise this moment of verbal truce.

"I fell", she repeated, this time chuckling, "I fell", she started laughing. House didn't know if he had to smile at that or not, "I fell on my ass!" she said.

"Okay…" House said, trying to smile.

"No, you don't get it, House!" She turned to face him with a smile, "The dean of medicine fell on her fucking ass!" House figured she was trying to hint at something. But the smile she was giving her made him ten million times fuzzier inside than any puzzle she was coming up with for him to solve.

"Did you hurt yourself?" He asked, not really getting anything in the end.

"You're hopeless!" She shook her head."

"What?" he expressed, "What do you want me to say?"

"I want you to…I need you to… I don't know." She let out with a sigh, probably giving up.

He nudged closer to her, "I know what you want me to say." He smiled at her the moment she looked back at him. The tender look he was giving her reminded her of all the times she had wanted him to be like that after a sarcastic comment, after a fight, after anything that was them. However she was the vulnerable one by now, she was hoping that he would be who she had always known. "I've always told you your ass was too big for those heels. Next time I'll be there to catch you. For safety measures, I swear!" He softly said, never giving up on his smile as she stared at him, her tears making them glow in the dark of the night.

The man who would save her.

House stood up in a slow move and walked a few step away from her. She didn't want that proximity to end now. She knew she would dread what would come up next.

"It might take years to figure out a way to get that chip off my brain without killing me." He said staring at the empty road.

Being the doctor that she was, she could only agree with him but he didn't need her to nod or even say it out loud. He wasn't watching her anyway. The intensity was held within the leaden air surrounding them, confining the answer to their future in the words he would let her hear.

"You know how I feel about you and I know how you feel about me." He said. Staring at the back of a man speaking words he would have never spoken a few days ago was the most frustrating experience ever for Cuddy but she didn't have to look into his eyes to understand the reasoning behind them. She just had to hear them. He was telling the truth. He was letting her in. The grand gesture was in fact a small one considering all the events they had gone through. It was a fact, something bigger than their little person alone. It was the whole foundation of them. It was just not where they had to start things again.

He turned around and walked slowly back to her and offered her his hand, "God you look awful!" he looked horrified, "What is wrong with women wanting to get so wet all the sudden?" he arched a brow and she laughed softly, accepting his hand. With a little push he swept her off her ass and helped her standing up. She crashed against his chest and as she raised her chin to lock eyes with him he said, "Would you like to grab some coffee with an obnoxious ass of an ex-convict?"

She buried her face in the crook of his neck and closed her eyes, "I'd be delighted to." She smiled, "But I won't have a problem kicking you in the nuts if you squeeze it too hard." She added, putting his left hand on her ass and a grin on his face.

-----Fin


End file.
